As the Togruta ran after Rhylance, she pulled two throwing knives from her belt with her left hand. Rhylance had already proven himself to be quick and smart, so Tahiri had to take care of him in a relatively quick, and mostly unharmed, fashion.
“You should not have followed me, Tahiri.” Rhylance had stopped running and now stood in the middle of the room, rising to his full height and facing her.
Well, I guess I’ll have more than a report to bring back Tahiri thought grimly to herself, as she studied the Chiss. He still held the silenced blaster, though at his side, and his left hand was lightly clutching something.
“Oh? And why is that?” Tahiri replied with a sly grin.
Before the Chiss could answer, Tahiri expertly flicked her left wrist in a quick twisting succession, sending both throwing knives straight at Rhylance at slightly different angles. Each blade aimed at a different part of his person.
However, almost simultaneously Rhylance flicked forward his left hand, sending the contents flying towards Tahiri’s feet. The Togrute only had a small glimpse of the tiny vial before the glass shattered near her right foot. As the contents of the vial made contact with the air, it sparked and sent a small cloud of vapor up, dissipating in the air around Tahiri.
Sithspit! What the...?!
Rhylance barely managed to dodge one of the throwing daggers that was aimed for his torso, though it did make a small cut in his jackets left side. The second, however, was aimed lower and further to his right, buried itself halfway into his upper right thigh.
Tahiri tried to get out of the vapor cloud, trying not to inhale any of it. However in her initial shock, the Togruta sucked in some of vapor. She could smell and taste a mixture of some sort of floral sweetness mixed with the pungency of chemicals.
“What the kark was that, Rhylance?” Tahiri asked with a snarl. “Some sort of perfume? What, you think I smell bad or something?”
The Sith Togruta heard Rhylance grunted as he pulled the throwing dagger from his thigh. The Chiss tossed the dagger away and leveled his pistol once more towards Tahiri.
“No, miss Tahiri, you don’t smell bad,” Rhylance replied calmly, shifting his weight slightly off of his right leg.
“That my dear, was my own personal blend of a hallucinogenic poison. It effects vary from person to person, so I’m not sure how my Fear gas will affect you.”
“Fear gas? What sort of trick is that?” Tahiri’s eyes widened.
“You have your tricks, and I have mine,” the Chiss said smugly.
Tahiri’s vision began to darken slightly. Shaking her head, trying rid herself of growing haze, the Sith tried to keep her eyes on Rhylance. It was getting hard to concentrate on the Chiss though, as out of her peripheral vision, Tahiri saw dark figures come at her.
He has friends? What is going on? There is no one else here, how is this possible?
Swinging her crimson saber to keep the others away, Tahiri unsheathed her blacked-out vibrosword, ready for any other advances from the dark figures and Rhylance.
“Well no matter, your little tricks and friends won’t be enough to save you.” Tahiri was about to launch herself towards Rhylance, but was stopped as a dark figure with a sword advanced towards her. Tahiri twisted around, bring her vibrosword up to block the blow. However, the strike never came, she turned her head to see where the figure went, finding nothing.
Tahiri’s senses screamed at her that another attack was coming up behind her. Acting instinctively, the Togruta ducked, rolling to the side and coming up again with swords crossed, slashing at thin air.
A slight chuckle shifted the Togruta’s attention back to Rhylance. Realizing he had holstered his pistol, she looked at him for a moment, confused as to the implications of the gesture. Tahiri didn’t have much time to contemplate as another larger figure ran towards her from the right.
“Well, I see that you are quite busy with my friends. As interesting as this is, I must go,” Rhylance tugged at the bottom of his jacket, straightening it a bit.
Tahiri looked at him with wide eyes from a corner of the large room. The dark figures kept coming and seemed to be getting bigger as more of them appeared.
“I hope that we meet again, just on different terms next time.” Rhylance turned on his heel, and walked toward the exit, listening to the grunting of the Sith Togruta as she fought imaginary foes. He would have to observe her another time, right now he just wanted to get out before sustaining any more injuries to his person.
Positive Takeaways
Atmosphere
The post does a good job of creating a tense, spy-like atmosphere as Tahiri is making her way towards the room Rhylance is in. Providing a sense of atmosphere allows the reader to visualise the post easier. To improve this, I would suggest incorporating the venue more as well as looking for opportunities to use each character’s strengths and interests to find something they can focus on to give it a more well-rounded view of the situation.
Can Be Improved
Unclear Motivations
While the post attempts to provide motivation for Tahiri to be present, it never goes into any real detail, with the who sent her, who she’s doing recon on and why, major things a reader would want to know, a mystery. Though at least an attempt was made. There’s no real attempt at explaining what Rhylance is doing. He appears to be looking for something, but we again don’t know what or why. Establishing the why of things is an important part of the opening post and should be something covered in a post that wants to do well. I would suggest trying to look into the characters and finding things that could be used to give them a purpose for being in the location. Positions and Aspects are a couple of good sources, maybe even talking to the other participant to gain a better understanding of their character could also be beneficial to you in improving this aspect of your writing.