The sharp splash of water echoed across the avenue as Grot raced through the slums. This time of night most respectable citizens of Nar Shaddaa avoided the streets, and the disreputable ones quickly ducked into the shadows at the sight of the armor-clad Trandoshan. The mercenary paid them no heed as he fled through the artificial twilight, his mind focused on a single thought.
He was being followed.
He gasped in exhaustion as he ran, feeling the stench of methane and rotten eggs from the sewers fill his nostrils as he struggled for breath. Trandoshans just weren’t built for this sort of running, and for once in his life he cursed his lack of sweat glands. He’d thought that by going through the slums he could lose his pursuers, but even over the beating of his own heart he could still hear the tell-tale tapping of their feet. He listened carefully to the rhythm, Only one now…
It was an odd feeling, to be hunted, and he despised it
He turned right down an alley barely big enough for two people abreast. The buildings leaned in close here, fighting for space in the densely packed refugee sector, but Grot was sure he could use that to his advantage. He ran a few more paces, listening ever carefully to the drumming of his enemies feet. Just a few more steps...
Turning suddenly on his heel, Grot released his revolvers from their holster in a swift, practiced movement. In such a narrow alley he barely had to aim as he brought them up for a volley. Almost in tandem with his movement, there was a sharp hiss and a bright flash of crimson red as his opponent confirmed his worst suspicions. A lightsaber.
He fired, six slugs sailing towards his opponent as his pistols barked in chorus with each other. The lightsaber flashed from place to place in a whirl of movement, sending up bright, white streaks as his slugs vaporized on impact. He held his fire, unwilling to waste more ammunition and curious about his assailant. The Force-user remained cautiously on guard, his body turned towards his opponent to minimize his profile and his saber held out ready to deflect another fusillade.
Lit by the blood-red glow of his saber, Grot could see his opponent's face beneath his cloak. His dark blue skin looked almost purple in the obscene lighting, a scar on his left cheek standing out in high-relief. A pair of sharp red eyes glittered with an exaggerated malice, his pupils still dilating. Instantly the mercenary could pick him out as a Chiss, a rare sight outside of their corner of the galaxy.
“Try again, I’ll even let you reload.” A cocky smirk rested easily on his chiseled features, showing supreme confidence in his abilities. A gentle wind blew through the Alley, and Grot’s eyes flicked over to the Taldyran design on his cloak, making the Sith’s Identity clear.
“This does not concern you, Aldaric,” the Trandoshan growled with serpentine malice as he recognized the Aedile, “We need not be enemies.”
“There are many in Taldyran who would argue that.” The Chiss answered, pleasantly surprised at being recognized. “I’ve no intention of harming you. Provided you cooperate, of course.”
“Cooperate?” Grot hissed, not daring to lower his revolvers for a moment.
“The data-chip,” Aldaric said bluntly. “Don’t try to act coy, we know you have it.” There was a momentary rustle as the Sith pulled a sack from his robes. With a callous shake, he emptied it’s contents on the ground in front of him, the scent of singed blood overpowering Grot’s nostrils. The severed head landed on the ground with a dull thump, rolling over on it’s side to reveal the pale, freckled face of the slicer Grot had met in s bar just hours prior.
“Did you think we wouldn’t notice such an attack on our systems? This kid was dead the moment he breached our firewall. What surprised us, though, was that the DIA was able to track him down faster than we could.” He kicked the head away callously, and flashed another smile at the Trandoshan.
“Do you have any idea what’s on that chip?”
“I do not care.”
“Enough to start a war,” Aldaric carried on, ignoring Grot’s blunt interruption. “I suppose that’s why they chose to use you, isn’t it?”
Grot merely growled in response to his pointed comment, but was unable to deny his growing curiosity.
“A lone mercenary, acting without official orders. Easy to disavow you if the mission goes wrong; I’d imagine the idea was to throw you in front of the speeder from the very beginning,”the blue-skinned Sith chuckled. “You won’t be escaping with that chip. Even now there's a Taldyran strike-force setting a perimeter around this whole forsaken slum. You’ve failed your mission, but you don’t have to go home with nothing.”
“What are you suggesting?” Grot hissed, curiosity getting the better of him as he began to lower his pistols. Aldaric deactivated his saber, plunging them back suddenly into the dim twilight of the city as he outstretched a hand to the mercenary.
“Hand over the chip peacefully, and Taldyran is prepared to offer you compensation for the loss. You can even go back home to Arcona and say we got to the slicer before you ever arrived. You get paid, and nobody has to know what happened here. All you have to do is hand over the chip.”
The Trandoshan’s hands were moving before he fully realized what he was doing — holstering his pistols in response to the Sith’s offer. It seemed eminently reasonable, and without even really considering he began to walk towards Force-user. He felt his head and pulse pounding as he neared Aldaric, subconsciously fighting against each step. Why am I doing this?
“Take out the chip.” The Chiss’s tone grew firmer, taking a sharp edge as he felt the mercenary begin to struggle. Yet there was no dispelling Grot’s doubt once it began to grow in his mind. With every step he felt the urge to obey the Sith wane. He advanced no longer under suggestion, but at his own free will. With deliberate steps he edged closer, till he struck like a coiled serpent.
Freeing his electro-bisent from the straps anchoring it to his back and lunged, the electro-plasma filament at its head hissing to life. The activation of Aldaric’s lightsaber was a roar by comparison, parrying the strike to the side in a spray of sparks. Digging in his heels, the Trandoshan quickly turned his thrust into a slash, sweeping upward into the Sith’s armpit.
Aldaric leapt back, sharp, ghostly pin pricks across his chest warning him of the danger. With a casual flick he attempted to parry counter the over-extended mercenary, but the strength and ferocity of the blow utterly surprised him. His blade was nearly soaring out of his loose, one-handed grip by the strike, and he stumbled backward in an attempt to regain his stance. He could feel Grot’s murderous intent rise and fall with each thrust as the mercenary chased him back, barely able to keep up with the flurry of blows.
In the back of his mind the Chiss began to panic, knowing he couldn’t keep up with this assault indefinitely. He lunged desperately, looking for an opportunity for a counter-strike, but simply couldn’t close the distance and get under the Trandoshan’s guard. For a moment only the spark and flash of their weapons filled the alley, drowning out their labored breaths as the mercenary drove his robed opponent ever backward. The smell of ozone slowly suffocated the area, smoke raising in thin wispy trails towards the city sky.
Grot felt his arms burn and shake as he struggled through the weight of his armour. He could feel his footwork grow sloppy, his strikes begin to slow, and in that moment Aldaric found the opportunity he was looking for. For a moment he seemed almost a blur as he leaped to the side with unnatural speed, his blade poised for a killing blow. With a furious thrust, he drove his saber straight toward his opponents heart.
There was a bright flash as his blade rebounded off of a translucent energy shield surrounding his opponent,materializing just moments before his blade struck true. A burst of flames and sparks erupted from Grot’s belt as the shield failed and catastrophically overloaded, forcing Aldaric to draw his shield his face as the mercenary leapt backwards. There was a sharp hiss as Grot pulled a smoke grenade and chucked it at his opponent, capitalizing on the opportunity to escape. In the back of his mind he knew he had no more time to waste fighting, the Taldyran strike force would be here soon.
With a roar Grot’s jet-pack sputtered to life, shining bright orange through the growing smoke as he propelled himself down the alley. Aldaric raced forward into the smoke, slashing one more time at the mercenaries heels as he sailed out of reach.
Positive Takeaways
This post maintained tension, and the audience’s rapt attention, from start to finish. I like how you started with the chase and peppered in the necessary exposition in the middle during a character confrontation.
Can Be Improved
You had a few stray typos throughout the post like this one.
I think you overstated the skill difference between 4 in Bladed Weapons vs 3 in the Makashi saber form. Makashi isn’t defensive like Soresu but it is focused on one on one duelling. This doesn’t rise to the level of a realism error but it is something to keep in mind for future matches.