The castle had yet to recover from the battle that had taken place here. The skirmish had been brief and fairly contained, but it's damage was evident. If Khryso Mallus didn't know that the First Order had struck here only a few years ago, this particular castle might have been lost among the other ruins that dotted Takodana's surface. Something that did set it apart, however, was the lack of plant overgrowth on the structure. Vines were just beginning to creep up over the disorderly piles of cobblestone while grass had started splitting the paved floors. The Chiss was grateful; he'd had his fair share of trudging through knee-high foliage and wasn't eager to revisit the experience. What he was not grateful for, however, was this assignment.
The Shadow Academy had recently received an influx of new recruits. In order to get these new members some experience, some of the higher ranking members of the Academy had been given a newbie tag-along to take care of. Khryso was still fairly new to the organization himself, but in the months since he'd arrived, the Sith Hunter had risen up the ranks quickly and proved his worth. He had thought being paired up with old, dusty geezers would be the worst of it, but he hadn't anticipated teaming up with someone who was still an Enrollee.
That Enrollee was Acolyte Karran Val'teo, a tattooed Zabrak who nearly matched Khryso in height, but had a much more robust musculature. Despite his worries, Karran hadn't performed unsatisfactorily while the scoured the broken castle for any relics that had been passed over. Unfortunately, however, their day-long search had turned up nothing of value. The place had been picked clean by scavengers or perhaps its previous owner long before they had gotten here. The two Sith were on their way back to the entrance of the castle when things became a bit more complicated.
Camped just inside the door of the castle, in a large vestibule about thirty-five meters square, was a group of four beings. They were dressed in patchwork leather armor and pads and all obviously armed with out-dated but still functional-looking blasters. They had a few bins of equipment between them that they were going through. They were no doubt planning on plundering whatever they could find inside the castle. Karran reached for his lightsaber, but Khryso set his hand on his wrist, speaking in a low voice. "Stop. I'll handle this."
Khryso stepped forward and reached out his arm towards the scavengers as they took notice of them. Two of them reached for their blasters while one, a human, stepped towards Khryso. The Chiss willed the Force into his words as he spoke. "You were just leaving, no need to bother us." A look of contentment passed over the human's face as he repeated the words and turned to signal his crew to pack up. One of the others, however, a Duros, leaped up, pulling out his pistol.
"What are you trying to pull?!" He shouted, raising his weapon towards Khryso. Before the Hunter could answer, Karran leaped past him, a lightsaber ignited in his hands. The Duros, in a panic, couldn't switch targets fast enough and was cut down. As the rest of the scavengers scrambled to meet the threat, they also met the Zabrak's blade and all hit the floor in seconds.
Karran withdrew his lightsaber and replaced it on his belt. "That was easy," he said, mostly to himself, in satisfaction.
Khryso, however, was far from satisfied. "What was that?" the Chiss demanded, marching forward. "I told you to stand down. I had the situation under control."
Karran snorted. "Stop complaining, I saved your hide. Besides, you've been giving orders all day. I've been aching to let loose."
Khryso furrowed his brow. "Don't forget that I outrank you, that was my call to make. Apologize and perhaps I'll leave your misstep off of my report."
"Misstep?" Karran glowered at the upset Chiss. "Not only did I deal with the guy that had the drop on you, I ended it quickly. If you're so pissy about it, that's your problem, not mine."
Khryso grimaced, reaching down and unclipping his lightsaber from his belt. "I suppose I'll just have to teach you some respect, then, Acolyte." With a quick press of the button, the lightsaber's vibrant violet blade appeared, giving off its signature electric hum. Karran smirked slightly and grabbed his own saber, quickly raising it into a two-handed ready stance in front of him.
Positive Takeaways
You start with some pretty decent build up. You go into detail about the setting, what the characters are doing there, even delve a little bit into the characters themselves which make for a pretty solid opener.
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Things To Think About
The major note I want to touch upon is very important for the Duelist Hall. There must be combat between the two participating characters in every post. This post does contain combat, however, it is specific to characters versus npcs. There is no character versus character which is an absolute must. Secondly, tense shifts, which can greatly affect the readability of the post. I found myself stumbling a fair bit over the shifts.