Lucine approached slowly, unclipping her lightsaber from her belt. Though there was a pleasant smile on her face, the look of cold fury in her eyes spoke volumes. TuQ’uan huddled on the ground, clutching his side in what he hoped was a convincing show of agony. In truth, most of his discomfort was not feigned. Each breath sent searing pain through his body, causing his breathing to sound like a harsh wheeze. He watched out of the corner of his eye as she drew nearer before lashing out with his foot, tripping her.
She fell to the ground with a heavy thud, but TuQ’uan made no move to press his advantage. Instead, he rolled away, pulling his datapad from his pocket as he did so. It took only a few swipes to open up the interface to the program that gave him remote access to the lighting system. It was the same program he had used to turn up the lights when he had first approached Lucine, and he was glad that he had kept it open.
The redhead was already gaining her feet as he hastily typed in a single command. Abruptly, all of the lights were extinguished, casting the room into murky darkness. The Kel Dor hastily turned off his datapad so that the glow of the screen would not give away his position.
“Hey! Who turned out the lights? What’s going on out there?” Amrel shouted from his hiding spot. TuQ’uan made no move to silence the man. Instead, he used his shouting to cover his movements as he angled around where the woman last stood, trying to reach the spot where his blaster pistol had fallen.
The mission could still be salvaged, but he needed to put some distance between himself and the Force user. It was inadvisable to try to engage the woman in close combat, especially since he did not know what powers she could use.
He moved with slow, measured footsteps in the direction where he thought his weapon was. Every footstep, every agonized breath sounded too loud to his ears, and he expected to be attacked at any moment. But no attack came.
He listened intently, trying to pinpoint the woman’s location, but Amrel’s shouts also obscured her movements. They were both fumbling in the dark, waiting for the other to attack or make a noise.
At last, he felt his boot impact against something small and metallic. He froze, before reaching slowly to feel the familiar surface of his blaster pistol. He picked it up, before nodding grimly to himself. Now he just had to find the redhead. He retrieved his vibrodagger from his belt and hurled it in front of him and slightly to his right. It landed several feet away with a clatter that sounded deafening, even amid the ambient creaks and groans of the ship.
A green plasma blade flared to life, arcing toward the noise. It was all TuQ’uan needed. He lifted his blaster pistol and fired, three shots in rapid succession. He saw the blade angle change to intercept the bolts, causing them to ricochet away harmlessly.
The Kel Dor kept moving, shooting as quickly as his trusted weapon would allow, trying to overcome his opponent through sheer force. The emerald blade weaved in the darkness, creating a mesmerizing pattern. Sparks flew each time a bolt impacted with it, sending the blazing red bolt angling away. Abruptly, the lightsaber blade changed its angle, sending the bolts arcing back toward him. TuQ’uan dived out of the way, and the first bolt passed within inches of his head. The other seared into his right shoulder as he moved, and he cried out in pain.
She was using the trajectory to figure out my location, he realized. The plasma blade winked out, and he could hear the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps. Knowing that the redhead was closing in, TuQ’uan fumbled for the sonic grenade at his belt. Before he could arm it something heavy collided with him, sending him sprawling to the floor. He landed on the same side as his broken ribs, causing stars to explode before his eyes. He was dimly aware of pain blossoming all over his body. The redhead could not see him, so she was simply lashing out as viciously as she could, trying to hit something vital.
“Oy! What in the bleedin’ hell’s goin’ on in here?”
The voice was accompanied by brilliant light as the illumination devices within the room were turned on. Weak with pain, TuQ’uan looked up to see an outraged pirate standing in the control room.
“Nothing of interest,” Lucine said with a disarming smile as she turned to hide her deactivated lightsaber from the pirate’s gaze. She lashed out with her foot, catching the Kel Dor in the temple. He collapsed with a thud, unconscious. “These men owe me money and needed some convincing to pay up.”
“She’s lying! Help!” Amrel called from behind the generators.
Lucine assumed an aggrieved expression as she made an odd twisting gesture with her right hand. “Debtors and liars. Clearly, they deserved a beating.”
The pirate stared at her for a long moment through the control room window, before nodding his head grudgingly. “They deserved a beating,” he repeated slowly, her words striking a particular chord with him. “Yeah, yeah I get it. My cousin’s just like that.”
The Sith beamed, seemingly thrilled that she had found someone who understood her plight. “Would you be a dear and give me a few more minutes alone with them? We were just about to come to an understanding.”
“Ain’t no skin off my nose,” the pirate said.
“No! Don’t leave! Help! Please! She’s crazy!” Amrel shouted, but the pirate gave no response as he exited the control room, no doubt to seek out the money his cousin owed him.
“Now,” Lucine said in a saccharine time. “Amrel, darling? It is time we finished our little chat.”
What We Liked
Using NPCs in an ACC match is tricky, especially when you have a tight upper limit on length. However, we think you nailed the balance here. Lucine’s use of a hired thug and the fact that she and TuQ’uan are competing for the same mark provides great mileage for characterization and narrative, but you avoided the temptation to go too deep and neither Gor’lat nor Amren ever get in the way of the core conflict between Lucine and TuQ.
What Needs Work
“Rude on the hat insult </3” - Wally
“n1” - Arch’s bird
There’s really not much to pick at here.