JK Seridan Brehevik vs. PAD Shorurra

Jedi Knight Seridan Brehevik

Journeyman 4, Journeyman tier, Clan Odan-Urr
Male Miraluka, Sentinel, Shadow
vs.

Padawan Shorurra

Journeyman 3, Journeyman tier, Clan Odan-Urr
Male Wookiee, Guardian, Juggernaut
Comment

Really close match. Both of you could do with some proofreading and more care on the realism front. A bit of an improvement on either of those fronts could have tipped the scales in either direction.

Hall Duelist Hall - Old Container
Messages 4 out of 4
Time Limit 3 Days
Battle Style Alternative Ending
Battle Status Judged
Combatants JK Seridan Brehevik, PAD Shorurra
Winner PAD Shorurra
Force Setting Standard
Weapon Setting Standard
JK Seridan Brehevik's Character Snapshot Snapshot
PAD Shorurra's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Venue Shadow Academy - Sparring Room
Last Post 19 September, 2014 3:23 AM UTC
Syntax - 15%
Corvus Corax Shorurra
Score: 3 Score: 3
Rationale: Minor inconsistencies with capitalization. "Wookiee" should always be capitalized "ryyk blade" should not be. You also made a few spelling mistakes in your final post. Rationale: In the same vein, "the Force" should always be capitalized, but "lightsaber" should not be. You also misuse commas and periods in several places. Getting someone to proofread your posts would make world of difference here.
Story - 40%
Corvus Corax Shorurra
Score: 3 Score: 3
Rationale: Good introduction, with a pretty standard fight following. Rationale: You took what Seridan gave you and went to pretty much the same place that he did. A "training match" without any significant stakes doesn't make for the most compelling reading.
Realism - 25%
Corvus Corax Shorurra
Score: 3 Score: 3
Rationale: I'm skeptical that with an injured knee, against a quicker and stronger opponent with no discrepancy in martial art skill that Seridan would be able to come out on top in the way you described. You effectively also ignore the blow Shorurra made in his first post, which as a Wookiee with +3 Might, shouldn't be something that someone could just shrug off. Rationale: According to Seridan's CS, he's not actually as quick as you make him out to be. Physical agility is measured by the Athletics skill and Shorurra has +2 more in it than Seridian (as of this fight). Also, Form 0 is not capable of "lightning fast parries" at any skill level
Continuity - 20%
Corvus Corax Shorurra
Score: 4 Score: 5
Rationale: In Shorurra's first post, he made no mention of knocking your lightsaber from your hand, but you summoned it back anyway. It's not inconceivable that it could have happened as a result of the blow you took, but it needs to be mentioned anyway. Rationale: No issues.
Corvus Corax's Score: 3.2 Shorurra's Score: 3.4
Posts

You enter one of the dozens of sparring chambers within the Shadow Academy of Lyspair, the simple square room utilized mostly by those learning the ways of the lightsaber. This five hundred square-foot room, rectangular in shape, is nearly barren. The floor is lined with simple padding, while the walls are made of dull, grey durasteel, gauged by innumerable lightsaber strikes, scarring the metal permanently.

The ceiling towers above you, nearly twenty feet in height, allowing for plenty of movement from the more acrobatic of Force users. There are no other adornments within the room, save for the entrance and lighting that bathes the entire room, yet seems to come from nowhere. All corners of the room are perfectly lit, with no visible shadows to speak of. There is nowhere for you to hide within the room, but… there's no room for your opponent to hide either.

The afternoon was drawing to a close and the sun was setting, projecting the most brilliant colours onto the clouds. As Seridan wandered the quiet precinct, a dishevelled student hurried past, no doubt just having finished her classes.

Seridan himself had taken a course there earlier that day; he’d been taught the mechanics of various starships. Before heading to his quarters, however, he’d decided to see if anyone was willing to spar.

He strode down the gloomy corridor, glancing in each sparring room and finding each one empty. The end of the corridor was fast approaching, and with each empty room Seridan’s disappointment grew.

However, all was not lost. In the penultimate room, Seridan saw a young Wookiee practicing his cadences. Seridan recognised him: it was Shorurra.

The young wookiee had hooked up with Odan-Urr recently and whilst Seridan didn’t know much about him, he knew that he had enthusiasm. It seemed though that Seridan had misjudged him. Whilst his technique wasn’t refined, Shorurra’s speed and dexterity would almost definitely match his own. Seridan couldn’t help but be mildly impressed as he continued to watch the Padawan from the doorway.

As Seridan watched, Shorurra swapped his lightsaber for a more exotic weapon: a Ryyk blade. As Shorurra wielded it, it seemed truly an extension of his arm; a deadly appendage that could deliver swiftly and reliably. However as he proceeded to practice, Seridan could sense that he wasn’t a master yet. Every now and then, he would attempt a cadence that was more ambitious than the rest and ultimately, he would stumble or unintentionally hit the floor with his blade.

Satisfied that he had seen enough, Seridan stepped forward and said “You’re pretty talented with a weapon. Any good with a blaster?”

Shorurra turned round sharply, and his eyes were striking. Hazel and green intertwined; the colours of nature. After a moment of thought, he growled in the guttural tones of Shyriiwook, “Yeah, I am. Wanna see me shoot a bull’s eye? What do you want, anyway?”

Seridan smirked at the use of the Wookiee’s native language. He’d spent a year or so on Kashyyyk, and had learnt to speak it semi-fluently. “I’d rather not, thanks. I’m not one for guns. Anyway, I’ve been wandering the halls looking for someone to challenge to a sword fight. You up for it?”

He saw the Wookiee’s face register Seridan’s unusual knowledge of his language, and then it changed as he comprehended his challenge. He shrugged, his fur rippling from the movement, “Sure, I’ve got nothing better to do.”

Shorurra swapped his ryyk blade for his lightsaber, obviously loosening up as he did so. The two opponents sized each other up. Shorurra was at least a foot shorter than Seridan, though he probably weighed more. Seridan knew of the great strength of the Wookiee’s but didn’t know how much Shorurra possessed at his young age.

After a moment, Seridan flashed a grin and began running at the wookiee, who had turned to the side and had brought his blue blade up, ready to meet Seridan’s. Seridan swung to the left, Shorurra’s blade moving to parry. Seridan rolled under the blade and tried to catch the wookiee’s side, but Shorurra’s weapon again deflected the attack. The strength of the parry almost knocked Seridan’s hilt out of his hand. The raw strength that Shorurra possessed was more than he would have guessed.

Seridan continued to dance around the wookiee, dodging parries and counterattacks alike. He started to hear the familiar rhythm of battle and took comfort from its tempo. Shorurra’s strength was impressive when paired to his speed. A few times Seridan had to hold his hilt in place with the Force, otherwise it would have been thrown from his hand.

Seridan felt the sweat glistening on his forehead, and saw no signs of exhaustion on his opponent’s face. Seridan lunged rapidly towards Shorurra’s right leg, but it was quickly, but clumsily, deflected. As Shorurra swung his blade round for a quick counter strike, Seridan brought his blade up for a quick parry. An echo of fatigue was slowly seeping into his arms, a reminder that he wasn’t invincible and that he could indeed lose. Instead of parrying the wookiee’s swing, he ducked under it, rolling backwards and away from the carpet of fur.

Shorurra paused, unsure whether to press his opponent. Instead he stood ready, awaiting Seridan’s advance. “You fight well, Miraluka. You dance around me and I cannot touch you.” He growled.

“You were indeed impressive too, but our fight has only just begun.” Seridan grinned. He held his lightsaber firmly and prepared to face his formidable opponent once more. A deep breath, a glance into those green eyes, and he was ready.

‘Let’s go,’ he thought and then he charged.

Shorurra took a step back, breathing deeply into his powerful lungs, the swiftness of his Miraluka opponent was to be expected. After all, he was very slim, his wiry frame making him look weak compared to the Wookiee sparring partners he had trained with in the Jungles of Kashyyyk. However, his opponent had the force, and while he knew he could overpower his opponent with raw strength, his technique with a Lightsaber was still sloppy and unrefined.

Bringing his Lightsaber back to a ready position, he had only moments before his opponent charged back at him, he quickly studied the young Jedi in front of him. His blonde hair, while well kept in length was messy. Overly large seeming robes seemed to fall to his sides as though they were handed down from a larger person. The blue and white fabric that covered his empty eye sockets was a little unsettling at first glance but Shorurra's master had been teaching him to accept all things in life, even the way that some people looked or came across at first glance.

As his opponent charged at him Shorurra took a step back bracing himself for the flurry of attacks that he expected from a swordsman of Seridan's level. Seridan moved his blade low sweeping it at the young Wookiee's legs, clumsily swinging his blade down to parry the blow, Seridan jumped in the air switching his attack from low to high in a split second. Tripping over his large feet Shorurra managed to fall out of the way of the attack bringing a smirk to his opponents lips.

Seeing the grin Shorurra got back to his feet a look of rage flashing through his eyes, he knew that he would need a different strategy if he had any chance to win this fight. Then he thought back to what his master had taught him. In a fight, if you can't out match your opponents skill, then cheat. A foolhardy grin broke across his face, making Seridan's head cock to the side with curiosity.

"What's so funny?" Seridan asked bewilderment crossing his face.

Shorurra's grin turned into a full smile and he let out a small throaty chuckle, "I just may have figured out how to beat you," Shorurra said bringing his blade back up to his ready stance.

This time it was Seridan's turn to smile, the brashness of this young Wookiee in front of him baffled him, but, if he wanted to be cocky. Than Seridan would have to teach him some humility. Charging at his opponent, he swung his blade back and forth seeing Shorurra block and parry each blow with lightning fast parries, the strength of his blows bringing Seridan's blade a little farther from his body each time his attack was deflected. Swinging his blade up from the ground Shorurra blasted a powerful counter slash into his opponents blade making Seridan's muscles in his arm ache.

As the Miraluka’s blade came flying out to the side, Shorurra threw a punch into his opponent's rib cage, blasting the air out of Seridan's lungs and knocking him to the ground. As the Miraluka looked up to the young Wookiee he saw a fire in his eyes that he had not seen before. It looked as though he was toying with him before, holding back his full strength so he could measure the skill of his opponent.

No longer did the young Wookiee look clumsy or unbalanced, now he looked like a warrior of House Odan-Urr. "Like you said," Shorurra said bringing his blade back into his ready stance "our fight has only just begun."

Shorurra’s chest was pushed out, his shoulders back: the posture of confidence. His lightsaber was held ready in his hand, awaiting Seridan’s imminent attack. Seridan regained his breath as he cycled through his options, deciding upon the best course of action.

He looked up and met the green eyes of his opponent, “Good. That was good,” He paused and feigned exhaustion, “You surprise me, Padawan. You think it’s only just begun, but really it’s the beginning of the end.”

Seridan summoned his lightsaber to his hand, but mid-way through its arc, he altered the trajectory and it hit Shorurra’s hand, knocking the factory saber to the ground. In this time, Seridan had jumped to his feet. He lashed out with the Force, both hilts rattling across the floor and away from the battle.

Shorurra was fast, Seridan would give him that. Despite his shortness, at times Seridan saw echoes of the behemoth he would be in a few years time. Even with Seridan acting as fast as he could, Shorurra had had enough time to react to the loss of his lightsaber and in turn adopt a fighting stance. At least, it looked like one.

The wookiee had slouched forward an inch or two and his hands were at his sides. His green eyes never left him as Seridan turned sideways into a smaller target, his legs wider apart than usual to ensure stability.

The two opponents sat facing one another, and for a moment nothing happened: no movement and there was silence. The calm before a storm. Seridan saw a ripple in Shorurra’s fur a moment before a strike was thrown towards his knee. Seridan pivoted and threw a punch of his own towards the incoming strike. His punch connected, hitting the wall of muscle and fur. He could feel his punch being absorbed by flesh, though its effect was minimal. The wookiee’s blow was knocked off course slightly but its momentum was too great. It still hit Seridan’s knee, causing a flower of pain to sharply sprout. Seridan faltered and moved his body weight to his other leg.

Seridan stared at Shorurra, measuring his every move. Seridan pivoted once more, throwing an assault at the side of Shorurra’s neck, aiming for his potential pressure point. Seridan had never fought Wookiees before, so he wasn’t sure where abouts everything was. As Shorurra moved to throw him, Seridan adapted and used the wookiee's shoulder to somersault over Shorurra’s back.

Instead of completing the manoeuvre with a final knock-ou blow, Seridan’s knee gave way upon landing, forcing Seridan to roll. He put the majority of his weight on his good leg, putting him in quite an unfamiliar stance. Shorurra was a bit shaken by the sudden feint, but spun around anyway, throwing a deceptively fast hook. Seridan intuitively jerked his head to the side, dodging the fist of fur that whizzed past. He launched himself backwards with a bit of effort, coming clear of Shorurra’s range. In a smooth motion, Seridan rolled once more, ignoring the pain in his leg as he stood. He focussed all his Force energy into a ball then released it towards Shorurra.

Meanwhile, Shorurra had been knocked off-balance by Seridan’s dodge. He had come back to his ready position, his hands at his sides as his eyes searched the room and found Seridan’s. The Miraluka’s arms extended towards him, a wave of energy sweeping him backward. He fell backward onto the floor, winded.

Seridan limped over to Shorurra’s side, offering a helping hand. Shorurra looked up at Seridan and growled, “Hey, man. You’re pretty good. We’ll have to do this again sometime.”

Seridan was about to reply, but jerked out of the way of Shorurra’s kick. The foot still caught the side of his body and spun him around. Instead of stopping the spin or falling over, Seridan followed the spin through, extending his hurt leg and catching the wookiee on the side of his head.

Shorurra slumped to the ground, unconscious. The fight was won.

That final kick had done Seridan’s leg in. It couldn’t take any pressure and any movement caused a stab of pain. The left side of his body was still stinging from that kick, and he was beginning to feel the crush of exhaustion.

“Well, I got a fight,” Seridan mumbled, speaking to no one but himself, “A harder fight than I expected, but hey, at least it was exciting.”

He slowly limped over to the wall, leaning against it for support as he waited for Shorurra to wake. His friend might need assistance after all. Hell, Seridan probably needed it more.

Seridan winced as he rose from the ground, his ribs bruised from the sheer force of the young Wookiee’s punch. He had never been in one on one combat with a Wookiee before but had heard stories of Wookiees ripping the arms from one’s body when enraged and he was in no hurry to test if that so called fact was true or not. Clipping his Lightsaber to his belt, Seridan motioned for Shorurra to mirror his actions.

Stowing his blade, Shorurra looked at Seridan with a puzzled look, “I thought we were sparring?” Shorurra said quizzically.

“There is more to sparring than just dueling with a Lightsaber, young one,” Seridan replied, turning to the side and lowering himself into the Echani stance. Putting his hand up, he wondered what fighting style Shorurra would go with to counter. “When you're ready,” Seridan said, taking a shallow breath and wincing once more from the pain in his ribs.

Shorurra hunched his shoulders slightly, moving his feet to the ready position. Staring down the Miraluka in front of him, he had no experience against a fighting style as fluid and dynamic as the Echani style, but he was very good at dismantling the foes he had faced in the past; even bringing a sparring match with his master to a close draw.

With a roar Shorurra charged at his opponent, swinging his mighty fists back and forth in a fluid rhythm. Seridan bobbed and weaved moving around each one of the young Wookiee’s strikes, seemingly at ease. Seridan did not know exactly what Shorurra was thinking, swinging slowly enough for him to easily move backwards out of the way of each strike.

Sliding his foot back to avoid another strike from the young Wookiee, Seridan heard a metallic clang as he slid into the durasteel wall behind him. A shot of panic raced through him; he did not know if he could take another direct strike from his opponent. Seridan unleashed a wave of force energy, making Shorurra slide backwards into the center of the room.

Unleashing another roar, Shorurra called upon the force, making his blood boil with rage. Charging back at his opponent, Shorurra rained strike after strike on his opponent as fast and hard as he could. Seridan moved in a circle desperately dodging what strikes he could and deflecting what he could not. The young Wookiee’s stamina and speed gave Seridan a split second in between monstrous attacks. Shorurra let out a primal roar as he shifted his feet, bringing his full weight to bear behind his fist as he slammed it into Seridan’s chest.

Hurtling backwards, Seridan crumpled to the floor. Gasping for breath, he pulled up his communicator from his belt and gasped into it. Unable to draw breath. Shorurra snarled as he looked down on the Miraluka at his feet. Bringing his foot up to crush Seridan’s head, Shorurra stopped. Realizing he was about to kill his friend, Shorurra lowered his foot and snatched up the communicator that Seridan had grabbed off his belt calling the medical droids to come pick Seridan up from the sparring room. “Next time, maybe you will win.” He said putting a hand on the Miraluka’s chest and smiling. Shorurra winced as he felt the shattered remnants of Seridan’s destroyed rib cage under his fist. He could only assume that in his current state Seridan would die without serious medical attention. Blood spurted out of Seridan’s mouth as he struggled, gasping to draw breath. “Next time.” Seridan coughed, a spray of blood spewing from his mouth as he struggled labouriously to bring air back into his ruined torso.

As Shorurra watched the medical droids rush Seridan from the sparring room, he could not help but feel a pang of regret for injuring his friend so.