“Frack!” He thought. “Where the hell is she?”
There was no time to look around properly, as the raging beast turned all its hatred towards the towering Zeltron who shone like a beacon in its murderous eyes. One step, then another, it picked up the pace, getting on its four legs for maximum speed.
Sage, too, was running, although away from the beast. Even he couldn’t knock out an enormous monstrosity such as his foe.
The mighty Rancor tore through tree after tree, not slowing an inch. In fact, the beast was closing distance on Sage.
“I need a new plan. Think, Sage,” the Zeltron started imagining ways of losing his pursuer. “What can’t a large beast do?” The very fast pace that he was being forced to run was now causing him to pant.
“AHA!” He yelled. Immediately, he planted his left foot firmly on the ground, sliding slightly due to the muddiness of the area, and turned sharply to the right. “Large beasts can’t turn.” He thought smugly in his head. Then BAM!
The mighty Zeltron flew like a ragdoll through several trees. Luckily for him, they were all rotten inside. Not so luckily, it still hurt, a lot. The Boss only had time to cross guard with his bulky arms in hopes of deflecting some of the impact, to no avail.
He landed on a small clearing, bruised, dizzy, and worst of all, dirty.
“M-Mister Boss?” Zaagnika pulled on Sage’s left arm, trying to shake him awake. She spoke low in tune as to not give her position away.
He grunted and raised his right knee. Then, suddenly, “HAAAAAAAA!!!!” Sage sat up in a blink, raising both his arms up high. His wake-up scream scared Zag, who jumped backwards with a small squeak. The Zygerrian vanished from view as quickly as she could and crouched near a large stone.
“What happened?” The Zeltron questioned. “Thought I heard the pip…Oh frakk me!” Sage looked down with pain at the state of his once beautiful white pants. Shades of brown now covered most of it, and rips and tears were all over it.
“Oh, I’m so gonna kill this thing.” He got back on his feet. With a hand on his right shoulder, he rotated it, feeling some pain.
“How are you not dead?” Zag questioned, her voice now lower in pitch. “I saw you flying dozens of meters.”
“Ah, so you didn’t run after all," the red giant mocked.
“H-huh…of course not!” Zag mumbled, trying to disguise the fact that she was indeed going to run away. “Tactical retreat.” She said with confidence, mimicking Sage in his wide smile and thumbs up, like he had given her earlier.
What had really happened was pure coincidence. Zag had vanished with aid from the Force and slowly made her way out of that habitat confinement. She wasn’t expecting Sage to fly over and land right in front of her. But seeing him laying there, she couldn’t just leave him too.
Sage looked in the direction he came from — a trail of broken trees. The Rancor wasn’t roaring anymore, but faint shakes could be felt whenever it walked. The Zeltron checked the integrity of his brass knuckles. They were still solid.
Taking a deep breath, Sage prepared to yell once more to get the beast’s attention.
“No!” Zag stretched her hand towards the Zeltron’s face, having to jump in order to reach it. She then firmly grabbed his cheeks and pulled him down.
Sage was now bent, his face at Zag’s level and his cheeks still being pinched hard.
“Listen here, you big pile of muscles," she started. “You already tried that once and look what it did to you. We need to think.” She released him, allowing the Zeltron to regain his mighty figure. Zag then lost her composure and felt intimidated by the much larger man next to her. “S-Sorry…”
“Hmph.” A large breath sound came out of Sage’s nostrils. He then placed his hand on Zag’s head and patted her twice. “Fine. We’ll do it your way. Tell me the plan, missy.”
Zag wasn’t expecting the towering Zeltron to actually listen to her, which caught her off guard as she hadn’t thought of a plan yet. Keen to take the opportunity to shine, she quickly concocted something.
“We clearly can’t fight it head on,” she explained, much to Sage’s disapproval, “at least while he’s at his strongest.” She said to appease him. “If we manage to distract him, maybe lure him back to his confinement cage, we could then try and close it.” She paused. “This time for good.”
“And how would we distract him? Shouting did the trick earlier.” The Zeltron asked, to which Zag glanced with almost closed eyes.
“I’ve got this.” The Zygerrian showed Sage a handful of ricochet discs. He had seen them before. A well-placed shot could bounce a blaster bolt in several directions before hitting its target, catching it by surprise.
“Are you a good shot?” The large man queried.
“Yes!” Zag’s response was by impulse. “The best there is.”
The Boss cracked his fingers and neck.
“Then it’s settled.” He said. “You spread those thingys around its cage. I'll go and lure it there. You have 10 minutes. No more.”
“B-but…” She wasn’t allowed to finish. Sage darted off into the distance, being covered by some fog clouds that were now forming over the area. In her mind, she pictured the large Zeltron with his thumbs up and smile, looking all goofy and dumb.
“He’s probably gonna get killed,” she sighed, “why should I bother? But he did trust me. Blindly I should add.”
The Zygerrian was pensive. Could the Zeltron be so stupid as to actually trust someone he had just met? “Yes,” she thought, “he clearly is”. But she couldn’t help feeling happy someone was trusting her abilities. Those same abilities she often found herself doubting. He was counting on her, and she would deliver.
The Rancor’s cage was immense. All around it, debris could be seen, as well as rotting corpses. Some were of animals and others were of people. “Is this what awaits us?” Zag felt fear crawling through her fur, causing it to spike. “No. We’ve got this.”
The slim gray woman placed her ricochet discs the best she could, with help from her jetpack. Four were by the remnants of the door. Other four were outside, evenly spread out. She kept the remaining four to herself in case she needed a last-minute adjustment or strategic position. The Zygerrian had been keeping a close watch on her timer. One minute left.
She made sure Prattle was loaded and ready to fire, and that extra ammunition was at hands reach. Thirty seconds. Her hiding spot was good. There was no way she would be spotted. Not when a walking rainbow is sure to be nearby. But still, she felt uneasy.
10, 9, 8… The Zygerrian was sweating. Her hands were trembling. 7, 6, 5…Where was he? Had he run away? 4, 3, 2… “What to do? What to do?” Her heart was beating at the speed of a podracer out of control. 1…
The silence all around the area was shattered by the loudest roar she had ever heard. A deep scary roar like the mightiest thunder in the most violent of storms. Dozens of birds flew away in panic, and the terrestrial animals were unleashed in a frenzied stampede in every direction.
Dum Dum Dum Dum the sound of its feet was getting closer, the earth trembling with each one. Dust fell from the ceiling and some small rocks vibrated in place.
Out from the cover of trees came Sage, running way faster than she thought it was possible for a man of that size. “He didn’t run.”
Behind him, closer than The Boss would certainly like, the gigantic Rancor pursued — roaring in anger and drooling from its horrendous, malformed sharp toothed mouth.
The entrance to the confinement area had a slight ramp down. The Zeltron jumped as far as he could. It all played out slowly in Zag’s eyes. She saw Sage flying inside. Then followed the raging beast, trying to reach its meal with its clawed arms. The Zygerrian closed her eyes and fired bolt after bolt. She thought that if she fired as many as she could, one was bound to hit.
And she was right. Most of her bolts missed the ricochet discs, although some hit the Rancor, but a few of the bolts hit the target. Soon, a barrage of dancing bolts bounced back and forth from the ricochet discs — all causing an imaginary net that would drive the beast inside its cage. Everything was working according to plan.
What Zag hadn’t foreseen, though, was the beast’s reaction to the bolts. Instead of running to the safety of its cage, the enormous Rancor flayed its arms around like crazy. While on its rampage, it took several of the bolts in its arms, some actually piercing its hard skin. But it was destroying everything around it, including the support pillars that held the ceiling up. Zag could see cracks forming above her, as more and more dust fell, like a very dirty rainfall.
Soon, rocks started falling. First small, then bigger, then finally huge ones! Zaagnika was paralyzed. She couldn’t get her feet to move. Her cover had been destroyed and she was at risk of getting hit, surely sooner than later. She closed her eyes and crouched.
“Gotta go!” she heard. The Zygerrian felt her body being lifted from the ground and carried at great speed in one direction. As she opened her glowing emerald eyes, she found herself being carried like a crate under Sage’s bulky left arm. The mighty Zeltron carried her like she wasn’t even there. Her low weight was nothing for his muscles.
He ran as fast as he could, away from the falling rocks. As Zag was facing back, she could see everything that was happening. “My discs!” she thought. She still had everything else with her though. Then, her thoughts drifted into the fate of the Rancor. “Surely it’s dead now. They’re not gonna pay us!”
She was proven wrong. Her eyes witnessed a giant mindless beast waving its arms around, crushing lots of stones, while still being hit by others that were falling. But the Rancor lived, and it was actually getting out of the confinement area.
Its state wasn’t the best, even a giant beast feels pain from an equally giant falling rock. Some of its skin had been peeled off and blood gushed out. The already ugly Rancor looked even uglier, if that was possible.
When Sage deemed their distance safe, he stopped. He wasn’t very graceful in the way he put Zag down, simply dropping her face first on the muddy ground. But they were both alive, barely.
Positive Takeaways
This was fantastic, a great setup and solid ambiance, a clear declaration of which beast you were dealing with, and a good bit of action to round it out. I also really appreciate that Zag and Sage did a team attack with the fallen tree, you don’t get to see that often. All in all, an impressive opening post, just fantastic!
Can Be Improved
I honestly don’t have much to say here. You’re missing hyphens throughout but that’s not a major detractor, and while your avoidance of the oxford comma is personally an affront to the writing gods to me, it also isn’t a detractor :P
That said, you missed a space after a comma, and a singular comma that was not an oxford.