Kamjin stood in the center of the docking port of the Corrino Research Laboratory overseeing the controlled chaos around him. Headmistress Ciara had put out a call to all the Clans to assist with some escaped animals and Clan Scholae Palatinae had responded by dispatching several platoons of troopers to assist the erstwhile creature handlers at the facility. An armored trooper approached him with the latest manifest as additional troop transports began to land.
“See to it that those neural darts are distributed to all the new arrivals,” Kamjin said while signing off on the proffered manifest. The trooper snapped the manifest under his arm, saluted, and ran off shouting orders at the disembarking troopers. Kamjin swatted a bug that had landed on his neck. He hated the jungle. He was far more comfortable in milder climates...or at least climates with less insects. Rubbing the sore spot where the bug had bit him, he continued on with his inspection tour.
As he approached the area where Ciara was standing giving instructions from her datapad to the various members of the Clans who had answered her call; Kamjin stopped to watch an interesting exchange take place.
“I’ve told you, you cannot be assigned until your Master arrives,” Ciara said exasperated, pushing a strand of hair out of her eyes and back behind her ear. Kamjin smiled to himself, remember that same tone when she first became a Consul. As she began to walk off, the young Acolyte followed after her.
“I’m sorry Headmistress. I don’t know what’s delayed him. If you could just provide me with my task, I could begin to familiarize myself with it before he arrives.”
Ciara sighed, her patience was clearly running thin, “I cannot send out a new Acolyte into the jungle without a Master. I will not be responsible for…”
Kamjin placed a hand on her shoulder, cutting her off mid-sentence, “Come now, Ciara, I’m sure we can find something for this young Acolyte to tend to.” Kamjin looked at the Acolyte and he looked familiar, “And you are?”
“Acolyte Ellac Conrat, mi’lord,” he said, eager to please someone who appeared to be intervening on his behalf.
“Ellac...hmm...You’re Sykes’s apprentice, correct?” Kamjin said, taking the measure of the man. He was slightly taller than Kamjin and still had that youthful look about him. He was fit, as was befitting of a member of the Brotherhood and despite a small scar under his right eye looked thoroughly green behind the ears.
“That’s correct. As I was explaining to the Headmistress, I currently do not know where he is and if she would just…” Kamjin raised his other hand, cutting him off.
“I happen to know where Sykes is, and he won’t be joining us for a while,” he removed his hand from Ciara’s shoulder and took the datapad from her. He scanned it briefly until one entry caught his eye. “Ciara, I’ll take young Ellac here under my charge,” as he tapped a few commands into the datapad. “We’ll be taking this assignment.”
Ciara looked at the entry that had been made and gave Kamjin a puzzled look, “Are you certain he can handle it?”
Kamjin chuckled, “I’m glad you didn’t ask if I could handle it.” He handed the datapad back to her and wrapped his arm around Ellac’s neck, squeezing him into an uncomfortable hug. As he stooped over to Kamjin’s height, Kamjin gave him a playful knock on his chin, “Of course Ellac can handle it. He’s a Palatinaean after all!” Ellac was left befuddled but nodded along slowly realizing he was getting his wish.
Ciara did not look convinced. However, Kamjin was an Adept and had served the Brotherhood longer than her. If he felt that he could handle it, she wasn’t going to stop him. “Very well, but while you’re gone, the rest of your forces still need to be mustered to their assignments.”
“Of course,” Kamjin said beckoning over a light grey skinned Togruta. “My apprentice, Dukwtape, will continue to oversee the Palatinaean forces in my absence.”
“Yes, Master,” Dukwtape responded crisply. His voice dripped with ambition at the opportunity to be left in charge in Kamjin’s absence.
“Excellent, well, looks like everything’s been arranged here,” he smiled as he released Ellac.
“Come on, Ellac, I assume you’ve got everything you need?”
“Yes, mi’lord, I’m ready to go when you are.”
“Good, I’m ready now,” and Kamjin started to walk towards the outer edge of the docking port. Ellac was left dumbfounded at the sight. There went Kamjin in his Sector Admiral uniform and his command cloak billowing behind him walking off into the jungle. Ellac jogged to catch up to him.
“Mi’lord, shouldn’t you change into more appropriate fatigues or armor before we embark on this assignment?”
“Nope, I’ve got everything I need with me. Plus, I have you,” Kamjin said reaching the edge of the docking port and jumping lightly to the ground below. Ellac, more cautiously, gauged the jump and then followed after him.
“Mi’lord,” Ellac started after making a crotched landing into the soft swampy soil.
“First lesson, no more ‘mi’lord’ business. Call me Maverick or, if you must, Sector Admiral.”
“Of course, mi’lo...Maverick.”
Kamjin nodded in approval as he found the path leading away from the docking port and further inland from the facility. As they trekked along, Ellac attempted to take a measure of the man who had come to his defense and saw to it that he was given this chance to prove himself. Despite his otherwise aloof personality, he radiated power. Even an Acolyte as himself could sense that. The fact that the Headmistress so easily bowed to his direction further proved he was not a person to be trifled with.
Ellac swatted at a swarm of insects that had started to swarm around them as they moved farther inland and the swamp lands became less regulated. Already his skin was starting to itch from their bites drawing out his ire. Yet, Kamjin never broke his stride as he looked as if he was enjoying a casual stroll through a park.Ellac was left to wonder how he was able to avoid all these annoying insects.
“Maverick,” he huffed keeping up with the brisk pace Kamjin had set for them, “which of the escaped experiments are we going after?” Ellac, finally abreast with Kamjin, began to match his stride. “Perhaps some Nexu or an Acklay!” Kamjin didn’t turn but muttered, “Nope.”
Ellac was puzzled, he’d memorized all the beasts that were aligned with his detachment when they arrived. He figured he would have qualified for one of those two beasts given Sykes recent appraisal of his skills. Suddenly, Kamjin came to a stop. Ellac turned and reached out to him to see what had caused him to stop. The moment his fingers brushed Kamjin’s sleeve he received a small static shock.
Kamjin chuckled as Ellac reflexes caused him to snap back his hand in surprise. Ellac’s eyes went wide. Kamjin had been manipulating his Force Lightning to such a degree that he had created a static layer on his skin. Now that they had stopped walking and he could take a good look at Kamjin he noticed the insects were still swarming around him but as they came to land upon him they would curl up and fall to the ground electrocuted.
“Oh, Kark...what is that smell?” Now that they weren’t moving the stagnant air had surrounded them and reeked. Kamjin took in the terrain and motioned over to a small hill that was about half a body length taller than Ellac surrounded by a pool of water.
“Ellac, go take a sample of that water and soil.” If Ellac had bothered to look back he’d have seen a devious grin cross Kamjin’s face. Alas, he was too eager to please and rushed forward. Withdrawing his vibrodagger to serve as an impromptu shovel he approached the pile. As he drew closer, the stench became worse. Something akin to rotting vegetation mixed with the sickly smell of flesh. Suddenly, he was cautious as to what he was approaching. Suddenly, two things hit him at once. First, this was not soil at all and second, the sensation of his feet tripping and him falling face first into the pile of excrement and urine. He sputtered as it got in his mouth as he flailed to withdrawal from the pool. He retched up the filth that had gotten into his mouth and nose in addition to what remained of his morning meal. After a couple minutes, he was dry heaving and turned to look back at Kamjin.
“Well...your assessment?” Kamjin asked calmly.
Ellac, if he could feel anything other than the gritty taste left in his mouth and the burning sensation in his nose, would have felt raging hatred of Kamjin at that moment. A thought, however brief, went through his mind that Kamjin had tripped him on purpose. But that would have been insane. Why would Kamjin have done that? With great strength he sank his hand back into the pool and withdraw his dropped vibrodagger and attempted to wipe the blade clean on his tarnished robes.
“My assessment, Maverick,” he snapped out the name, “is that it’s poodoo!”
“Excellent, that is what we’re hunting,” Kamjin praised as if he was back at the Imperial Academy training new recruits who just discovered how to polish their brass.
Ellac was dumbfounded, “This...this is what we were hunting?”
“No, that,” Kamjin pointed to the three meter tall Rancor that was lazily eating the remains of what could have been one of the earlier expeditions into the swamp.
Towering easily twice as tall as Ellac, he suddenly felt a moment's hesitation for wanting to rush forth into the swamp. A gust of warm, noxious swamp gas came blowing past them towards the Rancor. The beast raised its head from its meal and sniffed the air. Slowly, it turned and took sight of them. It’s eyes blazed with ferocious energy at the sight of intruders within its territory. It dropped the carcass and rushed head first at Kamjin.
Kamjin, with an augmented grace, leaped out of the way of the swiping claw that attempted to grab him. Tumbling through the air, he landed perched on a nearby tree branch. The Rancor looked about, caught off guard by the quick movement, sniffing at the air. He turned and roared again at Kamjin before head butting into the tree. Kamjin shot his arm out to hold onto a protruding limb on the branch. As the Rancor looked up to see Kamjin still standing on the branch, he head butted the tree again. Leaves cascaded down upon the scene creating a curtain to the violence.
Ellac, shook himself out of the trance and remembered his training. Flipping the vibrodagger in his hand into a downward grasp, he charged at the Rancor. As he approached, he gracefully leaped up upon his knee, then using it as a springboard, flipped through the air above the Rancors head. Grasping the vibroblade now with both hands he brought it crashing down into the Rancor’s skull, feeling the blade vibrate as it passed through skin, muscle and skull; finally resting in the beast's brain. The light went out of beast’s eyes as it choked and sputtered. Muscles spasmed as it tried to reach up toward Ellac as it stumbled backwards and finally gave up the ghost. Ellac leapt clear as it crashed to the ground, sprawled out at the foot of the tree.
Kamjin gingerly landed on the ground and walked over to Ellac. He grinned as he took in the sight of the dead Rancor as Ellac extracted his blade, “Well...your assessment?”
This time, Ellac felt differently about the prompt, “You intentionally had me fall into his waste so that it would mask my smell. You knew that any change in the wind would cause him to smell us and attack because we’re within his hunting grounds.” Ellac beamed as he continued his answer,
“So while you served as a distraction, I was able to take him out with ease.”
Kamjin nodded in approval, “Very good, Acolyte.” He knelt and began inspecting the Rancor.
“Ciara is going to be upset, we’ve killed her little experiment.” Ellac’s voice started to betray a hint of concern that his moment of martial prowess would now cause him to be caught with the Headmistress’s displeasure.
Kamjin stood and walked around the beast taking it in, “I don’t think so.”
“You...don’t think so? Why is that?”
“Well, this was a child and a relatively new one,” Kamjin pointed at several stretch marks on the Rancor near the joints where there were healed tears in it’s skin.
“A...child?” Ellac looked closer and tried to recall his knowledge about Rancors.
“Come on, we need to get going.” Kamjin stood brushing out the wrinkles in his uniform.
“Get going? Aren’t we finished?”
Kamjin offered Ellac the datapad he had clipped to his belt. Ellac looked at the entry that had been queued up.
It read: Shadow Academy experiment 512901-P. It’s long been known of the fighting skills and domestication of the Rancor for use as mounts and fighting companions by several native tribes. However, their overall size makes them easy targets for enemies to focus their fire upon. Given the time and energy needed to successfully breed and raise each Rancor these losses make their combat usability overall low for our purposes. Therefore, we have introduced several modifications into our female Rancor that has dramatically decreased the spawning time to something more aligned to that of a womp rat has yielded several births in rapid succession. In addition, we’ve introduced additional genetic material that enables parthenogenesis meaning the Rancor, and all her children, are perpetually pregnant. This has exponentially increased the population within a short period of time. Further experimentation is needed to facilitate the domestication efforts as being in a state of continued pregnancy has caused extreme territorial protectiveness and multiplied their aggressive behavior by a factor of three.
Ellac looked up from the datapad, “Then this means?”
“Correct, this was one of the children. Judging by the stretch marks and it’s overall size, probably not more than a couple weeks old.”
“Given how long they’ve been freed…” Ellac trailed off.
“There could be dozens of them by now.” Kamjin started heading off on the trail again.
“Where are you going? Don’t we need to call this in?”
“Oh no, you and I have got this. We just need to capture the original experiment. The rest of these are just fodder along the way.” Ellac couldn’t understand how Kamjin was so calm heading off into the nest of an angry, pregnant Rancor with a brood of angry, pregnant, daughters waiting for them.
Positive Takeaways
You clearly identified the creature you and Ellac would be dealing with, as per the competition rules, thank you for that! You also gave it a twist with the introduced genetic mutations, which was nifty, if horrifying. Some of of your logic was sound (if disgusting, poor Ellac, I gagged), some...less so (not sure a vibrodagger is long enough to get through a rancor's skull but we'll let that one pass).
Can Be Improved
Syntax wise this was much better then the previous match I judged, you found a good proofer, only a couple of missing/extra commas.
I feel like you were fixing something here and forgot to put words back in, as this exchange doesn't make any sense. What was Ellac correct about? He was asking a question.
And the meat of things. I'm going to do these out of order so I can end on the bigger of the two.
The bigger one: the human bug zapper. This was interesting. A couple of arguments could be (and were) made, but ultimately Force Lightning, as written (a BURST of VIOLENT energy at a single target) means this was wildly contradictory to the power, which also falls under Major Detractor. It could be said the 'target' was Kamjin himself, but with the burst of violent energy part would have meant just frying yourself, not the bugs. This level of power modification would require a Feat, you might look into the Feat Suggestion Form the Voice has, as it is an interesting application of the power.