“You will have to forgive me little guy,” Kylex said mockingly while still clutching his own lightsaber, “but I wasn't exactly expecting to see another lightsaber all the way down here.”
The blue alien clearly had noticed the firm grip Kylex had on his weapon. “I’d love to stand here in in this cesspool and play standoff but I don't have the time. My name is Justinios Drake with House Dinaari of Clan Taldryan.” Justinios once again turned his attention back to the corpses he had just created. “If those words mean something to you than I would prefer you either attack me so we can get this over with or stow that weapon so that I continue to looks for… ah there is!”
“I am Kylex of Tacitus Athanasius, House…”
“Kylex will be sufficient. An introduction means you won't be attacking me, that is preferable.” The diminutive Jedi walked over to where the Sith Warrior was standing and tossed him the datachip. “That chip should have the location of whatever ramshackle hovel these brutes call home and I would like to visit them to recover my research data.”
Wait, is this Aleena just assuming my assistance? the Mandalorian asked himself. Kylex had no clue as to what Justinios’ research was or if he would take much interest in it even if he did but the Sith was still considered helping the Taldryanite. The bodies strewn about the alleyway indicated that following Justinios on his personal mission would likely lead to some more violence, plus the Aleena’s clan membership indicated he was also no friend to the Grand Master.
“Well I wasn't even planning on murdering anyone today but, sure, I will help you.”
“I thought that was already implied,” Justinios said with a shrug. “Come our destination isn't far and they will already know we are coming.”
With a skip in his step the Sith Warrior quickly caught up to Justinios, his head filled with glee imagining how many thugs might be waiting to taste his blade.
About twenty standard minutes later the duo stopped in an alleyway that was kiddie corner to an abandoned storefront that was, in fact, best described as ramshackle. As the two Force users looked upon the large group of well armed aliens standing outside the entrance, it was clear they had found their target.
Kylex spoke his assessment of the situation aloud. “I make two Rodians, a Bothan, three Twi’leks and a very angry looking Trandoshan.”
“Yes and all well armed,” Justinios responded, “the lizard looks like he is carrying a T-21.” The azure skinned Jedi went silent as continued to review the scene in front of him. “Give me your saber.”
The Sith Warrior simply looked at his new partner with a concern in his eye.
“Mine is too small, I need your so they can see it,” Justinios said while impatiently motioning for the weapon.
Kylex reluctantly handed over his lightsaber. “If your big plan is to scatter them with a saber throw I am more than capable…”
Before the human could finish his statement Justinios had rushed from their hiding spot, threw Kylex’s unlit lightsaber overhand towards the aliens and yelled, “GRENADE OUT!”
All seven of the guards went diving in multiple directions as the hilt sliced through the air. This little guy is kind of crazy, I like him, Kylex thought to himself. The white haired Mandalorian sprinted towards the fray, attempting to catch up to Justinios who had clearly used the moment of the confusion to put on a burst of speed.
As the lightsaber hit the ground, Justinios was already on top the Trandoshan. The scaled alien clearly had no idea the grenade was a ruse because the Aleena’s blue blade sliced through his torso as he was still crouched behind the barricade he had chosen as cover.
Seeing that his lightsaber had completed its flight and made contact with the ground, Kylex focused upon his weapon in an attempt to return it to his control. Simultaneously, one of the Twi’leks decided to go into hero mode and jumped in top of the “grenade” before the Sith could recover it.
While Kylex continued towards his now constrained weapon, Justinios moved onto the next closest targets which were both of the Rodians. Both of the green skinned aliens had not even found cover but simply hit the deck and covered their heads with their arms where they had been previously standing before the attack. The ruse was starting to wear off now that a few more seconds had passed since the Twi’lek had jumped on the fake explosive and had yet to be blown to pieces. The Rodian closest to Justinios was looking straight at the charging Kylex while yelling something in his native tongue at the would be hero Twi’lek who was also beginning to realize she had not been blown to smithereens.
Amazed she was still in one piece, the Twi’lek began to stand up while examining Kylex’s weapon. The alien was still not aware that the Sith was quickly bearing down on her. Kylex introduced himself with a brutal blow to the face, grabbing her head with both hands and pushing it down into his right knee. As the female alien fell to the ground unconscious and bleeding, Kylex snatched his weapon of her hand but hesitated before igniting the red blade.
Immediately in front of Kylex, his partner had also dispatched the two Rodians but the diminutive Jedi was now spending all his focus and energy deflecting and dodging blaster fire from the remaining three guards. The Bothan and two remaining Twi’leks were all focusing their attention on the acrobatic Aleena, still unaware there was a second threat.
Kylex easily flanked the three blaster wielding aliens from their left side. With a snap-hiss the crimson blade of the Sith’s lightsaber sprang to life. The Bothan clearly had heard the weapon activate because he attempted to pull the barrel of his blaster rifle around to meet the new attacker. A powerful overhand strike cleaved the furry thug in half just as the Twi’leks registered his presence. As the two remaining thugs also attempted to turn their weapons on Kylex he aggressively sliced upward from the previous blow, which lead his blade to trace a diagonal through the torso of the closest Twi’lek. Wasting no time, the Sith Warrior quickly spun around and reversed the blow through the torso of the final alien.
“A fake grenade, that was your plan?” Kylex asked while deactivating his weapon.
Justinios simply looked around at the corpses strewn about the ground and responded, “Looks to me like the plan worked.”
The female Twi’lek who had jumped on top of Kylex’s lightsaber began to slowly awaken from her unconscious state. Without any hesitation, Kylex walked over to her, placed the emitter to his lightsaber against her temple and activated the blade. As the lifeless body slumped back onto the duracrete, he deactivated the weapon once more but kept it in hand. “Well the element of surprise likely gone now, everyone inside must have heard this ruckus.”
“Well”, Justinios said to Kylex with his own deactivated weapon in his hand, “let us introduce ourselves formally .”
Syntax
Unnecessary comma when the list only has two items.
Hyphen required. As a general note, usually hypens are used to join two words, which act as an adjective that describes a noun in the sentence.
Comma required when the words after a quotation continue the sentence.
Comma required if you want to put ‘he told himself’ or ‘shouted the pint-sized Jedi’ right after it.
Your conscience makes you feel guilty when you do bad things, but your consciousness is your awareness. Based on the sentence, I believe you mean the latter.
Story
You need to work the description of the venue into your story. This unfortunately reads like the venue description and immediately takes me out of the story. Next time, I advise you to work the below into the story itself.
How about you tell me? You don’t tell me why Kylex is here anywhere in your first post, which should set up the backdrop for the rest of the match.
Nice addition to the story.
Realism
This seems out of character for Justinios. His ‘Wicked Problems, Worse Solutions’ prizes logic over overly simplistic solutions to problems. In more detail, ‘Justinios Drake has resolved to make measured decisions based on the facts and hand while minimizing the influence of preconceptions and prejudices.’ Murdering someone and having him spit on the dead guy seem far too emotional for his aspect.