On the fringes of the Outer Rim territories and famous for being the one-time location of the Rebel Alliance, Hoth is a frigid world marred with fissures created from the tidal pull of Hoth’s three moons. Blanketed in a frozen ocean, massive oceanic currents beneath the southern hemisphere are the cause of constant seismic activities that result in a constantly shifting landscape of tunnels and caves.
Buried into the side of a fissure reaching hundreds of meters into the core of the planet is a network of tunnels leading into a cave. Its sole entrance is suspended within the wall of the fissure, requiring one to rappel down the dangerous crevasse and into the tunnels; one small miscalculation could send explorers descending the rest of the unmeasured height deep within the planet’s core.
Insulated under several hundred meters of ice in all directions, the cave is protected against the gale force winds and the intense snowstorms that sweep along the planet’s surface. As a result, the cave is warmer than most of Hoth’s unforgiving cold with melting icicles dangling precariously overhead. In turn, this allows for more life to grow in addition to being a promising habitat for the hulking wampas that have been trapped this far below the surface. Beginning to thaw, it is obvious that this cave will eventually fall victim to seismic activity and disappear into the sheets of ice that surround it. Illuminating the cave’s interior with a dull blue glow, the luminous forms of lichen have taken up residence among the bones of the creatures unfortunate enough to be trapped here.
Caution must be exercised if one is to navigate the slippery slopes of the cave as melted icicles drip onto the cavern’s floor surface. In one corner of the cave, the ocean water has accumulated to form a large pool, providing sustenance to the rare lumni-spice growing within the crystalline complex, never to see the blue-white sun.
Syntax
Not a detractor, but you can just say 'vulpine.'
You've got two bits that could stand on their own as independent clauses, so a comma isn't beefy enough. I put in a semicolon, but you could also just make this two sentences.
I'm not going to treat this as a detractor because it's the venue name, but you don't need to capitalize this.
This was a bit awkwardly phrased. Maybe: "The air felt like molasses upon his limbs; he realized that his opponent had drawn upon the Force to slow his body.
Story
You didn't establish what Levi was doing here, why Mune went after him, or why they're fighting in the first place. You guys had a pretty good fight, but that's all it is - a fight scene. That's ok, but it's going to be really tough to build up a good Story score if you haven't show your reader why they should care who wins and who loses.
Realism
Physically, I don't think this works. The way this is written, Levi's already swinging. Hitting him in the chest will stagger him and sap the power from the swing, but the momentum of the staff means it'll still smack Mune. Probably not with the shocky part - Mune's going to be too close in - but it would still knock into him.
Again, swings have momentum and it's not easy to just redirect them in a perpendicular direction, and even if you can manage it, the blow won't have much power behind it.
The blow is coming straight down at Mune, and he jumps? Even if he's move backward very quickly, the staff should still catch him in the gut or at least the leg.