Savant Blade Ta'var vs. Warlord Andrelious J. Mimosa-Inahj

Savant Blade Ta'var

Equite 2, Equite tier, Clan Odan-Urr
Female Zeltron, Force Disciple, Arcanist
vs.

Warlord Andrelious J. Mimosa-Inahj

Equite 4, Equite tier, Clan Taldryan
Male Human, Sith, Seeker, Imperial
Comment

Greetings,

Thank you both for your participation in Phase I of the GJW XII ACC Event! I enjoyed the chance to judge your battle and found you both provided quality posts with interesting combat. Due to the nature of this event, I have left only very brief comments. If you would like more complete feedback, please contact me by email or Telegram and I would be happy to provide it as soon as time allows. Although Andrelious wrote a quality battle, ultimately Aura takes the match across several categories. Of particular note, realism cost Andrelious severely, while Aura also wrote a superior story. Despite this, I enjoyed the battle in its entirety and I look forward to both of you writing additional battles in this event!

~Mav

Hall Phase I: Winds of Change [GJWXII]
Messages 4 out of 4
Time Limit 3 Days
Competition [GJW XII Event Long] Combat Writing - ACC Ladder
Battle Style Alternative Ending
Battle Status Judged
Combatants Savant Blade Ta'var, Warlord Andrelious J. Mimosa-Inahj
Winner Savant Blade Ta'var
Force Setting Standard
Weapon Setting Standard
Savant Blade Ta'var's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Warlord Andrelious J. Mimosa-Inahj's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Venue Nar Shaddaa: Streets
Last Post 2 July, 2017 1:09 AM UTC
Syntax - 15%
Deleted Aurora "Aura" Ta'var
Score: 4 Score: 5
Rationale: Minor, but a comma is used in place of a period in the first post during a sequence of Blade's dialogue. Rationale: Nothing noticed.
Story - 40%
Deleted Aurora "Aura" Ta'var
Score: 4 Score: 5
Rationale: Overall, a relatively straightforward fight, but with attempts to integrate more than just the typical locking of sabers that were appreciated by this reader. There was one moment of "show it, don't say it" early on, regarding the 'obvious distaste' that Blade showed for Andrelious, and a couple of odd choices in descriptive language (e.g. moving into position to spear, but using a ritualistic sweep). Strong story otherwise. Rationale: A great job. Your final post was engaging and interesting, and the constant turmoil between wanting to finish off Andrelious and defending innocents was well executed.
Realism - 25%
Deleted Aurora "Aura" Ta'var
Score: 3 Score: 4
Rationale: Both characters are represented well, but I noticed two issues. First, Love In The Air effectively augments manipulation, but in this case, there is no indication Blade is manipulating Andrelious, and there's nothing about Andrelious suggesting he is a sucker for a pretty face, so it seems unusual he would drop his guard in this circumstance without any kind of attempt from Blade to manipulate him (I took this as a misapplication of the Species Feat, rather than poor writing). Much more seriously, in your second post, Andrelious takes a slice across the chest from a lightsaber, and although he cries out, the wound is not dealt with in any other explicit way. As written, Andrelious shows no ill effects of such a severe wound that would likely render most individuals incapacitated and require immediate medical attention. Instead, he carries on fighting - delivering the final blow a few lines later. Rationale: I only noticed one issue: the application of Force Lightning to a child in your final post. A stream of lightning as described would do more than make a small child writhe in pain (recall that such an application of Lightning nearly killed Luke); because this child has no impact on the story after this sequence, doing nothing more than cowering, this is relatively minor.
Continuity - 20%
Deleted Aurora "Aura" Ta'var
Score: 5 Score: 5
Rationale: No issues Rationale: No issues
Deleted's Score: 3.95 Aurora "Aura" Ta'var's Score: 4.75
Posts

Nar Shaddaa Streets

The Vertical City, Nar Shaddaa. They call it the Smuggler's Moon—an apt description based on the myriad of sentients shuffling back and forth with their illegal wares and hidden weapons. The narrow streets below criss-cross endlessly, soaring miles above the planet's surface. Exposed and uncovered, the streets offer a nearly perfect setting for someone with some skills with ranged weapons. From a vantage point on the ledge of a towering structure of glass and steel offers a dizzying view of the cityscape.

Simple shops and merchants peddle both legitimate and illegitimate wares. Storefronts are just as plentiful as open-market pop-up tents, and the cantina's adapt the same lowlife air as the rest of the Smuggler's Moon. Enemies could be hidden in plain sight, whether one of the Hutts’ gangsters or mercenaries-for-hire looking to earn some credits. The streets are plagued with violent gangs and the general riff raff of the poor and destitute. The streets may be an ideal place for blasters, but the winding streets are difficult to disappear from. An opponent would be easily boxed in and simple to finish with a few quick slashes of a lightsaber. The moon is dangerous—even for one gifted in the Force.

During his time in the Brotherhood, Andrelious had slowly become less used to crowded cityscapes. Nar Shaddaa was about as far removed as possible from the peaceful atmosphere that the mountains of Karufr had been. Before Cotelin’s betrayal had forced Clan Taldryan into hiding in space.

This Lotus contact better turn up soon! Andrelious thought, as he used his smaller size to make himself look as harmless as possible. Whilst the Sith was a powerful fighter, he did not relish the idea of having to engage in a scuffle with the many gangs that roamed the streets.

It wasn’t much longer before a second strong presence in the Force began to approach. Mimosa-Inahj hadn’t known what to expect, but he was soon craning his neck around to identify his contact. He spotted a female Zeltron, who looked surprisingly comfortable to be wearing the traditional robes of a Jedi, even in such a dangerous place.

Great. One of Odan-Urr’s zealots. They’re almost as bad as Pravus. Only not quite as deadly.

As she reached Andrelious, the Zeltron greeted the Sith with a customary bow, but her distaste towards the Sith was obvious.

“Ah. Rollmaster Ta’var. How goes training the new generation?” Andrelious began, having recognised the contact as his Odan-Urr counterpart, Blade Ta’var.

“At least we do train them, Sith. All you do is try to brainwash any poor youngling unfortunate enough to end up with Taldryan,” Blade replied, with a hint of annoyance in her tone.

“I try to open a door to more than just the narrow minded view that you Jedi take of the Force. Fearing the dark side makes you weak, Miss Ta’var. Weak and ineffective,” the Taldryanite answered coolly.

“You teach them that it’s sometimes alright to harm innocents. That alone is grounds for me to deal with you. Alliance or no alliance, you’re a threat,” the female declared.

“I don’t take kindly to people who describe me as a threat. Just give me whatever it is you’ve brought me to this place for, and get out of my face before I decide to show you just how much of a threat I can be!” Andrelious warned.

“Never takes you Sith long to prove my point,” Blade sighed. “Even among a crowd, you’re quite happy to resort to violence,”

Choosing not to answer, Andrelious reached for and activated his silver hilted lightsaber. He went to move towards Blade, but hesitated, as if he were having second thoughts. For a few moments, he even found himself wondering if the Zeltron were available for a few drinks, rather than a fight.

Seeing that the Sith had let his guard down, Blade activated her lightsaber. She moved in quickly, hoping to disable Andrelious with a single strike and avoid an actual fight. As she swung her weapon, however, the Human moved into a defensive stance.

“A nice try, Miss Ta’var. Your skills of deception are admirable. You might even be useful,” Mimosa-Inahj hissed. He took a single step back, immediately counter-attacking with a slower, more powerful slash that drew sparks as his opponent parried.

The crowds of people quickly reacted to the situation. Many ran in terror at the sight of a lightsaber, but others drew their own weapons, ready to take pot shots at the two Force users. Spotting multiple blasters aimed in his direction, Andrelious turned away from Blade, slicing through a pair of approaching Rodians.

“The rest of you. Out of my way!” the Seeker snapped, pushing his way into the throng of people before they could properly react to what had happened. He kept his lightsaber active, occasionally lopping off a limb of anybody who happened to get in his way. Andrelious hated to run from a fight, but he valued survival over victory.

I can’t let this happen! Blade realised, beginning to give chase. The crowd dispersed a little, oblivious to the fact that the Odanite would never repeat the actions of her Taldryan counterpart.

Spotting a series of walkways criss-crossing their way beneath his feet, Andrelious redirected his movement to allow himself to leap downwards, landing on the street below. He swapped his lightsaber for his E-11, taking a shot at Blade before resuming his movement. Once again, his shorter stature allowed the crowd to envelope him, further frustrating the Zeltron’s attempt to chase him down.

Come and get me, Miss Ta’var!

Aura desperately looked for the fleeing man, frustration mounting as the crowd of people clogged the streets again. She tracked the fleeing Sith below her by the telltale sign of distraught people left in his wake, usually with an accompanying yell. Several innocents were already missing limbs in Andrelious’ haste to run away. The smell of burnt flesh and painful moans filled the air, which made it even worse. Unwanted memories of dead innocents came back to her, reminding her of what she once was and what others still did in the pursuit of their ambitions.

The Zeltron tightened her grip on her lightsaber and glared in Andrelious’ direction, the old urge to exact revenge by the blade growing more tempting with each hurt civilian. She put aside her grudge with the Sith for a moment and turned off her saber, standing still as she repeated the Jedi Code to herself. With each line, she took a deep calming breath and told herself to trust in the Force.

Karking Sith! He had to pull out a saber. I told the Lotus to give this mission to someone else. Delivering this datapad to that schutta isn’t worth this many lives...

Aura sighed and quieted her inner monolog, reaching out to the Force to find her target once more. She could feel a darker presence somewhere off to the North and hoped Andrelious would not play hide and seek the whole time. The Zeltron opened her eyes and leaped down to the street below. She took off after the Sith as fast as the crowds would allow, often slithering between the masses of people as she followed the Force’s guidance along with the trail of disgruntled civilians.

Fortunately, the street ended in a long, wider corridor that currently housed a busy collection of open-market pop-up tents. Aura stood off to the side and used the Living Force to help find the Sith again.

“You’re still here. What game are you playing? You could have run away by now,” said Aurora to herself.

She wanted to draw him out, but the civilians complicated matters.

Maybe I can goad him out.

“Andrelious! Come out and fight, you Sithspit!” yelled Aura. A hush fell over the crowd, but the Sith’s dark presence simply moved towards what she assumed was going to be a lightsaber-made exit. “I was told that Karufr was destroyed. I’d have thought you’d want some revenge on Pravus for that little act. But if you don’t want the package, I can give it to someone else. Your choice,” yelled the Zeltron.

Several heartbeats went by as the corridor remained silent. Andrelious finally stopped moving.

“Fine then…” Aura turned around to leave.

“Wait!”

The Zeltron paused, hung up her cloak on a nearby stud, and smiled as she waited for her prey. The Sith finally separated himself from the crowd, standing a few paces away.

“Give it to me or I’ll take it off your dead body,” demanded Andrelious. Aura could feel an intense anger spill into the Force around the small man. The nearby locals backed off to a safer distance.

“I will, but first let’s get something straight. You aren’t getting away with harming all those innocents. Stand down and make retribution for what you’ve done here. No need to fight.” Aurora doubted he would take it, but it was worth a shot. It was what her master would have done.

“Wrong answer, Jedi.”

Figures.

The Sith activated one of his red lightsabers and swung a powerful overhead strike at Aura’s head. Her blue blade came to life as she deflected his saber to the side. She submerged herself in the Force and assaulted the Sith with a flurry of rapid, deceptive slashes as she danced around his attacks, looking for an opening. Andrelious pushed forward and swung back with a chain of wide-angle swings meant to beat her back into a nearby corner.

Aura pressed forward with explosive, quick jabs between his heavier swings. Undeterred, the Sith countered with several reversals. The Zeltron let the Force take control of her body as she ducked under one of Andrelious’ strikes and swung at his legs. Finally, the Sith relented and backed up a few steps, just enough to roll safely to her right to gain a little more separation. She popped back up, saber at the ready.

Andrelious glared angrily at the Zeltron. He had known very little about her, aside from her name and position in Odan-Urr, but was discovering that she was just as potent a fighter as any other in the ‘Jedi’ clan.

With no time for further verbal sparring, Mimosa-Inahj was soon on the offensive again. He charged in, varying his swings across all of Blade’s body, but the Odanite’s defensive moves were equal to each and every blow. Andrelious’ frustration grew with each block, and he soon found himself wishing an incredibly unpleasant fate on the determined female.

Starting to lunge forward, Andrelious pulled away at the last moment, again retreating several steps away. Blade started to move towards the Sith, but the Force screamed at her to stay back. The Zeltron, listening to her instincts, stopped advancing, holding her lightsaber directly in front of her.

Electric hatred spewed from the Sith’s outstretched fingers. Ta’var stood firm, even allowing herself a tiny smirk as her blade absorbed the attack with little more than a crackle.

As the lightning subsided, Blade was first to move. She charged in at full pace, her quick bladesmanship almost catching Andrelious completely off guard. As it was, the Sith was able to parry the initial attack with an almost half-hearted defensive move. Blade continued to hit at her opponent with a series of unpredictable slashes, each forcing a different kind of blocking action from the Taldryanite.

Keeping control of her weapon perfectly, Ta’var, having attacked low and to the left, changed direction completely, easily beating Andrelious for agility. As her blade came within half an inch of the Sith’s shoulder, the Zeltron started to feel more confident.

Time to win this! she thought.

Andrelious was determined not to allow his adversary another opening. He redoubled his own efforts, digging deep into the Force in search of a little extra punch in his attacks. Blade, meanwhile, was seeming to almost enjoy the fight.

“I thought your order was all about peace!” the Taldryanite hissed.

“And about destroying those who threaten that peace!” Blade snapped back as she stepped away from her opponent’s attempt to force a saber lock. Rearing back, she allowed the Force to lighten her movements a little, allowing her even more agility in her strikes. Andrelious began to struggle to cope with the speed of the rapid, flowing attacks.

With the Arcanist’s athleticism seeming completely unrelenting, Mimosa-Inahj was fast running out of ideas. Spotting Blade slow momentarily, the Taldryanite hit as hard as he could with an aggressive counter-attack, trying to smash his way past. Ta’var, continuing to put her trust fully in the Force, was able to anticipate the attack. However, the blow was powerful enough to force her to take a step back. Andrelious followed up with a set of three chained slashes, each with just enough punch to keep the Odanite on the defensive.

Chaos. Yet harmony, Blade remembered. She sprinted in, her body almost a blur, and, managing to evade another lumbering block from Andrelious, swiftly but effectively slashed across the Sith’s torso, cutting a diagonal wound along his chest. The Human cried out in pain, falling to his knees as he clutched the area with his left hand.

“One last chance, Sith. Stand yourself down,” the female ordered, pointing her lightsaber directly at Mimosa-Inahj’s nose.

Tossing his lightsaber aside, Andrelious barracked the Odanite with another wave of lightning. Blade, moving back, was too close to properly block the attack. Grimacing from the pain, the Zeltron tumbled backwards. As she fell, she called out to the Force, begging it to protect her.

The Taldryanite pressed on, hitting his opponent again and again with more lightning. The first few attempts met with Blade’s hastily constructed shield, eventually shattering it and leaving the female defenceless, and unconscious.

Sneering at his fallen enemy, Andrelious activated his black hilted lightsaber.

“You have failed, Jedi,” Mimosa-Inahj puffed, starting to find it harder to breath due to his own injury.

Andrelious took a few seconds, as if pondering his finishing move, before moving into position to spear Blade’s lungs with his lightsaber. With a single, almost ritualistic sweep of his lightsaber, the job was done.

“Goodbye, Blade Ta’var. You are worth the investigation,” Andrelious observed as he walked away, the information that his Odanite counterpart had safely in his free hand.

The day was won, but Mimosa-Inahj would have explaining to do.

Blue saber met red as a battle old as time replayed itself in the squalid streets of Nar Shaddaa. Andrelious swung again in a series of chopping strikes. Aura deflected the first swing but was forced to outright block the second. Her boots dug into the ground as he attempted to break her guard. The Zeltron’s arms started to buckle so she kicked off to the side, pushing her lightsaber against his with a heave. She staggered to her right, but this time Andrelious did not pursue.

“It’s going to be fun killing you, Jedi,” goaded the Sith. “Feel the true power of the Dark Side!”

Andrelious reached out a hand and used the Force to chuck metallic objects from a nearby stall towards the civilians, grabbing them one at a time. Aura grunted in frustration, doing her best to redirect or stop the wayward projectiles. For every one Aura deflected, the Sith immediately threw another, disengaging from his previous throw and letting her stop its forward momentum. She tried her best to keep up but Andrelious’ seemingly random choices kept her off balance.

“Ouch!”

“That hurt. Stop it!”

Innocents cried out as they did their best to take shelter. Small children cried for their parents, panicking in what was now the middle of a battlefield.

“Is this really what you want? Don’t you have a family yourself? Stop it!” yelled Aura angrily.

“They aren’t my family, Ta’var. Neither are they yours!” The Sith grinned and unleashed a stream of lightning from his fingertips towards a young boy sprinting towards the exit. Distracted and angry, the ominous snap-crackle was her only warning as she watched it strike the small child, who immediately fell to the ground and writhed in pain.

“Noooo! Stop it!” she yelled again as she pulled the Force into her legs and rushed to intercept it as quickly as possible.

Andrelious reveled in Aura’s furious, pained expression. He let the first stream die out and released yet another.

She turned off her saber as she skidded in front of the child and thrust her hands out, calling on the Force to shelter them from the bolt. A translucent corona sprang up in front of the stream of lightning, which crackled as she dispersed its energy evenly against her shield.

“Ha! Jedi are so predictable. Let’s see how long you can save him!” Andrelious was breathing heavily but continued his onslaught anyway.

The Sith unleashed another discharge. It dispersed against the barrier as she strained to keep the defensive corona from shattering. The child hid behind her back, holding onto part of her tunic.

“Take that!” yelled the overzealous Sith as he unleashed an even more feeble stream than before.

Won’t hold much longer...

Aura activated her saber and caught the stream of lightning with her blade. Andrelious glared between exhausted breaths and finally let his hands fall, his chest heaving from the effort of unleashing so much energy. Aura rushed forward to attack but the Sith still had one cheap trick left to play. He grabbed the nearest person — a scared Rodian — and activated his lightsaber as he held it precariously to his neck. She halted, waiting for his next move.

“End of the line, Jedi. Hand over the data or I kill him. Your choice.”

She sighed, frustrated at her lack of options: the Sith or the boy. Despite the temptation, it wasn’t a contest.

“Alright, take it. Just let him go unharmed.” Aura chucked the datapad on the ground between them. “Now the boy.”

The Sith pulled the datapad to his hand and smiled.

“You should know better, Ta’var.” The saber jerked slightly, severing the kid’s windpipe.

“Noooo!” yelled Aura in anguish.

The Sith took off as fast as he could, grinning as he pushed people away. A vicious surge of hatred coursed through her as she ran after him a few steps, but the faint gasps of the fallen kid distracted her.

Why is it always one or the other?

She put away her lightsaber and crouched over the dying child, hands forming into fists. All she could do was comfort him. She bit back her rage and focused on the boy.

“I’m sorry. Stay with me,” urged Aura as she saw the fear in his eyes. “Someone get a medic!”