Peacekeeper Ka Tarvitz vs. Augur Alaris Jinn

Peacekeeper Ka Tarvitz

Equite 1, Equite tier, Clan Odan-Urr
Male Human, Jedi, Juggernaut, Guardian
vs.

Augur Alaris Jinn

Equite 4, Equite tier, Clan Taldryan
Male Twi'lek, Force Disciple, Seeker
Comment

Thanks for participating in the first phase of the ACC portion of the GJW!

This was a fairly straight-forward battle containing some well-written action from both participants. I enjoyed reading it. Ka, your posts were technically clean; Alaris, there were a few minor issues that looked like they were missed in proofing as well as the minor detractor on realism. It's these latter points that turned out to be the deciding factor in the round.

Keep up the good work, gents!

The winner of this battle is Ka Tarvitz.

Hall Phase I: Winds of Change [GJWXII]
Messages 4 out of 4
Time Limit 3 Days
Competition [GJW XII Event Long] Combat Writing - ACC Ladder
Battle Style Alternative Ending
Battle Status Judged
Combatants Peacekeeper Ka Tarvitz, Augur Alaris Jinn
Winner Peacekeeper Ka Tarvitz
Force Setting Standard
Weapon Setting Standard
Peacekeeper Ka Tarvitz's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Augur Alaris Jinn's Character Snapshot Snapshot
Venue Dathomir: Desolate Swamps
Last Post 9 July, 2017 6:14 PM UTC
Syntax - 15%
Adept Alaris Jinn Nikora Rhan
Score: 4 Score: 5
Rationale: A few typos and missing words, but nothing major. Rationale: No issues noted.
Story - 40%
Adept Alaris Jinn Nikora Rhan
Score: 4 Score: 4
Rationale: Likewise, I thought you did an excellent job here. The action was well-written for the most part. Rationale: I liked how you setup the battle. Felt like a step up from the run-of-the-mill ACC match.
Realism - 25%
Adept Alaris Jinn Nikora Rhan
Score: 4 Score: 5
Rationale: The issue with the invisible entity noted in the first post has me puzzled. Rationale: No issues noted.
Continuity - 20%
Adept Alaris Jinn Nikora Rhan
Score: 5 Score: 5
Rationale: No issues noted. Rationale: No issues noted.
Adept Alaris Jinn's Score: 4.2 Nikora Rhan's Score: 4.6
Posts

Dathomir Desolate Swamp

Once, it was the home to the witches of Dathomir, otherwise known as the Nightsisters. Tucked away in from the rest of the galaxy in an isolated cluster, the Nightsisters were able to draw energy from the planet itself, and pursued a type of ritualistic magic. They ruled over the population of Zabarak—Nightbrothers—and used them as a warrior caste to serve their purposes.

Then, the Clone Wars. The Nightsisters were pulled into the conflict due to the machinations of Mother Talzin and her rival Darth Sidious. This ultimately lead to the eradication of the Dathomarians and their settlements. The desolation was claimed by the Confederacy of Independent Systems after the last Nightsiser fell.

Now, the planet known as Dathomir is a haunted skeleton of its former greatness. A perpetual crimson glow coats the planet. The bleak world has become an amalgamation of ruined forest, decrepit swamplands, and withered mountains worn to the sands of time.

In the desolate swamps, faint echoes haunt the graves of the long-dead witches, infusing the green fog that spreads above the damp ground. Dreadful whispers rumoured to be lingering incantations defend the world from intruders. Tall tales and rumors of zombies and ritual sacrifice alluding to grisly flashes of imagery.

The trees, large and misshapen, promise misery to those who touch their tortured bark and open themselves to the memories of the place. Eerie as the voices over the wind, the water beneath the fog appears red and bubbling, as if the land itself were pockmarked in cauldrons of blood to keep the incantations alive.

Creatures unaffected by the purge of the Nightsisters still remain. Snakes, reptiles and insects of varying lethality wander the wasteland. Reports have even said that rancor still roam freely.

This is Dathomir.

There were few worlds more unnerving than Dathomir. There were certainly deadlier worlds, places corrupted by generations of industrial pollution or cultivated by unending violence, but the shriveled husk of Dathomir seemed all the more disturbing by far. It was as if the planet had died decades ago yet kept going, slowly rotting from within as parasites ate away at what little remained.

Tarvitz made little effort to hide his disgust as he advanced through the undergrowth, leaving a trail of trampled half-dead bushes and fleeing vermin in his wake. The moist air warm enough to send a perpetual stream of scattered water droplets running down his visor, while the regal colours of his plating had been largely hidden beneath a thin layer of ashen mud. Not for the first time, he quietly cursed his target for managing to crash on this world above all others.

Said target had hardly been difficult to track down. The Lambda-class shuttle’s fiery descent had left a several mile long scar across the forests, easily visible to anyone searching for it. Downed either by pilot error or a cataclysmic mechanical failure, the ship had come to rest half-buried in a crater at the heart of the dense woodland. That had just left Tarvitz to track down and - assuming their intelligence was correct - recover any data cores of value which lurked within. Especially those which related to the Brotherhood’s missing Grand Master. In truth, Tarvitz had been expecting little from this venture. Rarely did something so fragile survive an orbit to surface landing intact, but orders had been orders. Yet, he certainly hadn’t been expecting company when he arrived.

The figure who opposed him stood waiting before the crashed vessel, lightsaber already in hand. Clad in the dark robes reserved only for the Brotherhood’s elite and distinguished by the twin head-tails of a Twi’lek, his stern features were cast into deep relief by the fires which had been ignited about the shuttle behind him. He showed no surprise as the mud coated Jensaarai stepped into the clearing, only an odd hint of disappointment.

“Leave,” the Dark Jedi simply commanded “I have no time to waste on you now.”

“Can’t do that,” Tarvitz said brightly, with an apologetic bow “Some associates of mine are very interested in the contents of that ship, and they’re not the sort to take no for an answer. I don’t suppose you would be willing to parley over its contents?”

“Not with scavengers,” the Twi’lek said, igniting the lightsaber and adding the low hum of its pale green blade to the constant crackling of the spreading flames behind him. “Now, flee or fall.”

“I’m afraid I can’t do that either,” Tarvitz said, taking a few cautionary steps towards the crash site “But I would be more than happy to accept your surrender.”

The Twi’lek’s expression gave Tarvitz all the answers he needed. In a flash he raised his hand, hurling a bolt of blue-white lightning at Tarvitz’s chest. The Jensaarai barely reacted in time, activating his own blade and intercepting the strike in one fluid movement. Even with that effort he felt the sting of several bolts racing about the weapon, each stabbing into his body.

“Well, it was worth a shot,” Tarvitz said, gritting his teeth against the pain and dropping into the half-crouch of the Shii-Cho form.

For the first few moments as they closed the distance between one another, neither seemed willing to strike the first blow. There was no sudden charge, no abrupt flurry of strikes as one sought to create an opening in the enemy’s guard. Instead they just stood there, each trying their best to gauge the other’s abilities and predict their movements.

Tarvitz was the first to strike. Waiting until the shuttle was behind him, and Twi’lek was squinting against its glare, he slashed the lightsaber downward towards his opponent’s head. The Dark Jedi immediately deflected it to one side before promptly pirouetting to one side to avoid a second strike, driving a kick towards Tarvitz’s right knee. The Jensaarai pulsed a thought a split-second before the blow connected, calling upon the Force to anchor himself in place. The kick connected with a loud crunch, but rather than flooring the Jensaarai as no doubt intended, he barely seemed to register the attack.

“Surprise,” Tarvitz laughed, before driving his fist into the Twi’lek’s face.

Adept Farrin Xies Tarentae, 10 July, 2017 10:39 PM UTC

The Dark Jedi immediately deflected it to one side before promptly pirouetting to one side to avoid a second strike, driving a kick towards Tarvitz’s right knee. The Jensaarai pulsed a thought a split-second before the blow connected, calling upon the Force to anchor himself in place. The kick connected with a loud crunch, but rather than flooring the Jensaarai as no doubt intended, he barely seemed to register the attack.

This is a good example of how to utilize the Iron Skin with one big exception - it allows you to shrug off the knockback/knockdown effects of a blow, but not the pain of one. Getting your knee cap shattered is going to hurt like a mother, even to your character.

Alaris Jinn was scarcely ever taken by surprise. The Force had pulled his head back with what looked like pure instinct, but it didn’t stop the Twi’lek from receiving a hard strike to his left eye. He stumbled backward and though it didn’t take him long to regain his footing, he was forced back into the fray sooner than he would have liked.

The massive man’s attack was simplistic, but it kept Alaris on the move. This suited the Twi’lek just fine. The Jedi pressed the attack, trying to maintain his advantage. Alaris kept moving backward, glancing blows from Ka’s amber blade off to either side. The Dark Jedi began to pant a little heavier. Ka kept his attack forward, forcing the much smaller man back toward the half buried shuttle containing the quarry both men were attempting to acquire.

Alaris stumbled and dropped to one knee. He glanced up with what looked like fear as Tarvitz brought his lightsaber in a downward arc, attempting to slice the Inquisitor from shoulder to hip. There was a mild gleam of amber in the Twi’lek’s eye and the dark side erupted from his coiled right leg. He dove into a roll just under the incoming strike. His momentum carried him upright. With as much force as he could muster, the Twi’lek drove his foot into the back of the Jedi’s knee.

Ka lost his footing as his knee buckled and had to bring his right hand down to support himself. Almost immediately, he felt a foot on his shoulder and he watched the Twi’lek use him as a springboard to land securely on top of the Lambda-class shuttle. It was these moments that the Twi’lek savoured so much. He turned slowly and looked down at the Peacekeeper. The heavy breathing had stopped and save the blood trickling from the cut on his eye, Alaris didn’t look like he had been in any kind of battle at all.

“Do you think I have survived this long in the Brotherhood without being faster than you? Smarter than you?” He smiled maniacally. “You will scarcely be a footnote in the storied history of Alaris Jinn.”

Tarvitz looked straight up at the arrogant Inquisitor and frowned. The arsenal of a man frowned then took off the treeline. Alaris’s eyebrows rose and then quickly turned into a sneer. He exhaled hard and breathed as much of the dark side into his left arm as possible. With a yell, he threw as much hatred as he could muster. The blue electricity spanned the distance between the two combatants nearly instantly and it stopped Tarvitz cold.

The burst lasted less time than the Twi’lek’s scream. He could have let the Jedi go, but his own arrogance was his downfall. He had revealed his name and now Tarvitz had to die. He jumped down from his perch and advanced as quickly as he could toward the human. He slowed as he got closer. He extinguished his lightsaber and replaced it with the ornate Sith Dagger from its sheath. As slowed to a walk he squinted and focused the dark side to the forest.

Ka took a step back from the forest, staring into it trying to catch a glimpse at what Alaris could only assume was the roar that didn’t exist. The Twi’lek used the opportunity and dove forward, stabbing forward with the treated blade. Ka was yanked sideways by an invisible entity and the blade only barely scratched against his arm. Alaris swore under his breath as he turned the dive into an aikido roll. When he returned to his feet, he flung the blade with everything he could at the human.

It landed harmlessly in the scorched earth. Tarvitz spun around and his gaze met with the Twi’lek’s. He had shaken off the roar of the non-existent rancor and stood firm. Blood dripped from his right tricep. Both men stood firm and then, as if in choreography, two bursts of light, one amber and one viridian, illuminated the landscape.

Adept Farrin Xies Tarentae, 10 July, 2017 10:47 PM UTC

The arsenal of a man frowned then took off the treeline.

Took off toward the treeline, maybe?

As slowed to a walk he squinted and focused the dark side to the forest.

As he slowed to a walk?

The Twi’lek used the opportunity and dove forward, stabbing forward with the treated blade. Ka was yanked sideways by an invisible entity and the blade only barely scratched against his arm.

I'm a bit confused by this. I'm assuming its a usage of telekinesis... but who used it? It doesn't seem like Alaris did, because he's angry the blade missed. Did Ka somehow TK himself? If so, that doesn't seem possible here.

“Tarvitz,” the armoured figure spoke as the nearby crackle of flames rose into a constant roar, bathing the two in an orange light.

“What?” Alaris frowned.

“My name,” Tarvitz chuckled, “If you’re going to reduce me to a footnote, you might as well get that part right.”

Alaris allowed himself the slightest smirk and then charged, brute strength meeting sheer speed as the two clashed. Tarvitz turned Alaris’ opening strike to one side before launching a riposte, only to find the Inquisitor darting away. Lunging to cut him off, he began hacking wildly away at Alaris, attempting to force him towards the flames, hemming him in to where he could land a finishing blow. An obvious ploy but as he forced Alaris to parry each slash, forgoing even the slightest offensive strike, for the first few seconds Tarvitz almost believed it was working. Almost.

He failed to notice it at first, but as the moments wore on he could not help but realize the wrongness with his surroundings. Half-seen things darted before his eyes, and each clash of plasma was deafening even through his helmet. The world seemed slow, somehow warped, but through it all he could see Alaris’ grin widening.

“I was wondering when that would take effect,” the Inquisitor sneered, the sound somehow amplified a hundredfold in Tarvitz’s ears. “Do you think this would be settled purely skill at arms?”

A phantom screamed past Tarvitz’s vision and he stumbled back. Noting his distracted state Alaris stepped forwards, knocking the lightsaber free from Tarvitz’s hand.

“Poison,” he continued, “is such a wonderful weapon. Even the slightest drop on a dagger’s blade can bring brutes like you low.”

Furiously shaking his head and attempting to peer past the illusions, Tarvitz fumbled with the rapier at his waist. Alaris casually stabbed outwards, severing the blade at its midpoint, before jabbing Tarvitz in his side. He screamed in pain, falling backwards as inches of flesh simply evaporated at its touch, sending a jolt of near paralysing agony rushing through him. It was no killing blow, nor even a true attack. Alaris was simply toying with him.

“Please…” Tarvitz managed, the strangled request barely escaping his lips and he feebly lifted one hand as if to ward off Alaris, trying to buy himself a few precious moments.

The Inquisitor sneered, raising his lightsaber again. All else had been forgotten to him, his full attention had been devoted to the weakling before him. He was going to savor this moment.

Tarvitz blinked unsteadily, and his hand curled into a fist as he reached out with the last reserves of his strength; focusing not upon Alaris but something discarded in the dirt behind him. Forgotten by its owner in the melee, the Sith dagger launched itself into the air and hurtled towards Tarvitz's hand, heedless of what lay between the two. It plunged into the small of Alaris’ back, eliciting an alarmed scream of pain from the Twi’lek. He stumbled forwards, the lightsaber falling from his grip as he sank to his knees, desperately clutching at the dagger.

With one final push Tarvitz lunged, his outstretched hand latching onto a lekku, yanking Alaris forwards as his other snatched up the broken sword at his side. He drove the blade into Alaris’ open mouth, and the shattered point emerged out the back of his neck in a splash of bloodied metal, cutting his screams short. Alaris shuddered for a moment as if refusing to accept such an inglorious end, before the light faded from his eyes.

With his strength spent, Tarvitz slumped backwards, letting Alaris’ corpse fall to one side of him. One less Inquisitor in the galaxy. It was victory of sorts, if a hollow one. As the poison coursing through his system completely took hold, distorting the world into a parody of itself, he managed to turn his head towards the burning shuttle. Impossible things danced across his vision, spectres of old foes and friends alike, but amid them he could see the rapid spread of the flames, slowly consuming the ship and whatever information lay within. Tarvitz knew he was in no state to brave the growing inferno. Even in death the Inquisitor had denied the Lotus Resistance their prize.

As the world faded away, Tarvitz quietly prayed that the sight was just a trick of Alaris’ venom. Then unconsciousness claimed him and he knew nothing more.

Adept Farrin Xies Tarentae, 10 July, 2017 10:51 PM UTC

An obvious ploy but as he forced Alaris to parry each slash, forgoing even the slightest offensive strike, for the first few seconds Tarvitz almost believed it was working.

This is awkwardly worded. I don't think it's incorrect necessarily, but it could have been worded better.

The two men stood motionless for several seconds. The stillness was eventually broken by the Jensaarai, who advanced with a balestra. Alaris retreated a few steps in response. Then stillness retook them. Dathomir itself seemed to breathe around the warriors. Ka, who wouldn’t let himself be unnerved by the dark side inherent in the planet’s atmosphere, finally broke the silence and brought a long, two-handed slash downward, trying to cleave Alaris in two. The Twi’lek just moved to the side. The blade came back in an upward slash and the Twi’lek moved aside again.

A third cleave came across the middle and Alaris simply jumped over it. This continued for several attacks. Alaris stayed just outside of Ka’s range, forcing the much larger man to advance if he wanted to bring anything to bear against the Inquisitor. Escape was not an option; he knew Alaris would pursue him. He needed to stay and force the Twi’lek into making an error. He just wasn’t sure how that would work yet.

“I can see that mind at work, Jedi.” The dark side dripped from the Twi’lek’s words. “Don’t strain a muscle, now.”

Tarvtiz shook off the taunts and pressed forward his attack. Each swing picked up speed. Alaris finally had to use his lightsaber to deflect some of the onslaught. The Augur smiled slightly, something the Jedi picked up on. The Jensaarai’s heart rate accelerated with his speed. The Force may have been able to enhance speed, but the heart still had to compensate and pump blood to the muscles, lungs, and brain.

Something suddenly caught the Peacekeeper’s eye. Just a flash of something off to his left. He turned his head suddenly to see what had caught his human eye, but whatever it had been disappeared as quickly as it had appeared. The Force flashed warnings at him and he returned his gaze to the Twi’lek just in time to catch a foot in the face.

He stumbled backward a few steps, more from the surprise than the strike, and tripped on an exposed root that had survived the scorching from the downed shuttle. He fell unceremoniously on his rear end. He pushed with his legs, trying to make some distance between himself and the Twi’lek. It worked because Alaris’s attention was pulled elsewhere.

It took a few moments, but suddenly the Sith Dagger the Twi’lek had thrown was back in his left hand. He sheathed it, then turned back to the Jensaarai, who had returned to his feet and was reading for the next attack.

“It’s a shame that you were so indoctrinated by the Jedi,” Alaris mused. “You would make for an excellent apprentice, if you were not so small minded.”

The thing to his left was back and Tarvitz turned to try to catch a glimpse of it before it disappeared. Alaris smiled and drank in the dark side of the Force that saturated the air. His eyes melted into a sickly amber hue and the tendrils of the Force flung from Alaris’s head and permeated into the Jedi’s. Another roar pulled at Ka’s mind, and he spun around, ready to face the rancor he was sure was going to burst over the edge of the crater. It never came, but a sudden and extreme pain suddenly shot from the back of his left thigh. He muffled a pained yell. Weakness overtook his leg, the muscles torn from the alchemical weapon gave out.

Alaris took a few steps back and watched Ka struggle to deal with the combined assaults of pain, poison, and mind. “What’s in that shuttle?” He spoke softly to the man collapsed before him. Tarvitz didn’t respond, so Alaris pressed further with his and increased volume. “What have you come here to collect?”

In the midst of a yell, Tarvitz was able to get out a short phrase. “I don’t know!”

Alaris raised an eyebrow and frowned. Had he broken the man and he was telling the truth, or was he more resilient than the Twi’lek had foreseen.

“No matter,” Alaris said, dismissively. “I’ll find out myself.”

With the flick of a wrist, viridian plasma sliced easily across the Jensaarai’s neck and the struggle and muffled yelling were no more.

Alaris turned around and looked at the fallen shuttle. “Now, tell me. What secrets can you tell?”

Adept Farrin Xies Tarentae, 10 July, 2017 10:54 PM UTC

Weakness overtook his leg, the muscles torn from the alchemical weapon gave out.

Seems like you're missing something to conjoin the clauses. Maybe an and?