Competition: Invasion Of Port Kasiya, week 1: Eastbrook - Slug Stutter #1

Finished
Invasion Of Port Kasiya, week 1: Eastbrook - Slug Stutter #1

You have arrived amidst the chaos as it unfolds before your character's eyes. Despite pledging to Taldryan, the gangs are uneased by your presence and are unwilling to listen to what you say. There's only one thing you can do, something that all gangs admire and respect... defeat them with some sick beats and rhymes.

You are to write your character engaging in a rap battle with either a member of the Deckers Gang or the Sixth Street Saints in the style of Epic Rap Battles of History in which your character disses, burns, and ruins the opposition You can say what you like (within reason) and the most creative, hilarious beats, and rhymes wins!

Rules: the Fiction must be at least 100 words long, and split into two stanzas, and also must feature your main or alt character.

Submissions: through the site in pdf, word, or the submission box below.

Grading: Grading will be based on creativity, as well as which ones burn the most.

Competition Information
Parent Competition
[Week 1]
Organized by
Crysenia Orainn
Running time
2021-10-08 until 2021-10-15 (8 days)
Target Unit
Clan Taldryan
Competition Type
Fiction
Awards
Third Level Crescents and Clusters of Ice as per VOICE guidelines
Participants
5 subscribers, of which 4 have participated.
Results
1st place
Dasha Talus
Member
Dasha Talus
File submission
2021-10-15_wk1_SlugStutter.docx
Placement
1st place
2nd place
Raiheaux
Member
Raiheaux
Textual submission

This is to the tune of, and inspired by, "Shots Fired" by Megan Thee Stallion. Warning, highly explicit lyrics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8jNPawT-aM

Imagine you be lyin' 'bout beatin’ us forthwith
Just to save face for deadbeat losers you chill with
Imagine me givin’ a kriff you took the kriffin’ port away
Proud of your conquest, but as boring as a Core World ballet
Now imagine me distracted by some rural half-wit
Not even worth the governorship, you think the city is united
And now it’s up to me, this week, your death is expedited
You offer creds for support, I guess that made the gangs excited, hmm

Now y'all in cahoots, huh, but we’re absolute
You came at our clan with a broke hobo crew
Talkin’ ‘bout crooks and bandits like their fighting’s really frightin’
A panicked leader with a panicked army in his feelings
Okay, you on the broadcast with your silly sales pitch
You now see the power that we came back with
You talkin’ bout your daughter but she just a fake Sith
You tell her, “You not scary, you just a sullen kid”
Now here we we, Kasiya, still a traitor
And I’m gonna show you want I do to wannabe dictators
Any fighters on this traitors side are just cred chasers
A thug who’s fakin’ or a merc that you payin', uh

Imagine me, hahaha
Imagine me entertaining you kriffin’ goofy-arse traitors and you kriffin’ goofy-arse snitches

Who you takin' shots at, goofy-arse traitor?
Keep your snitch arse out a Tal clan districts
And that go for your forces too that's tryna get rich
Take a seat, I'll slice up you, this is not a trick

Ooh Sith, it's a lotta weak suckers with this snitch
They confused
They hate us, but see our powers ain’t a trick

You a fink. You shoulda never took away our hard fought gains
Now you a sneak check behind your back cuz you just turned into prey, ayy

We’re on the attack uh, you can't handle that, huh?
You want us to be the bad guy, kill you off with your spawn
Force chose, I didn’t ask to break the motherkriffin’ mold
Not even a meter tall and you’ll still find my victory is foretold
Wield the Force always, sabers do the talkin'
I know you want the clout, so I ain't sayin' y'all names
Oh, you out here fightin’, huh? Who you get those credits from?
Two gangs down but however long will that last, huh?

I be confident 'cause I come with some real Sith
And your army we will slay, our entire clan is close-knit
You know we got the power all you traitors should just quit
Just one Taldrya one deep, and I am worth your whole clique, ayy

Who you takin' shots at, feeble minded twit?
Watchin’ me defeat your armies, no sweat
I know you want attention but you ain’t even a threat

We are lords, you a servant, fool just leave our space

Real power, yeah, yeah, I ain't wieldin’ ancient tales

Force choke a dude while another dude just bleedin’ there
Twit think he overwhelmin' somethin’, tryna run and tell
Dolt, I got a bond with my Taldrya and they all aware, yeah

Who you takin' shots at? Shut up with your useless mass
Dumb as a brick, kill you and noone’ll be sad
Attack while we’re down bad, we’ll remember all that
Next traitor send a shot, my saber sends it right back

Placement
2nd place
Member
Grand Inquisitor Morax Darkblade
Submission
Grand Inquisitor Morax Darkblade opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
3rd place
Member
Warlord Tracinya Beviin Entar
Submission
Warlord Tracinya Beviin Entar opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
4th place