Competition: [May The Fourth 2024] Week 2: That Hutt Called Kam...

Finished
[May The Fourth 2024] Week 2: That Hutt Called Kam...

M4

Kam worked with Socks hand-in-hand to make sure the M4 fine print was extra tiny. However, he is still a Hutt after all, and there must be a Hutt brother-Hutt sister rivalry of some sort.

You are tasked with creating the best IN CHARACTER insult to Other Mav Kam.

You can be as creative as you like, there is no minimum or maximum word count. However, please remember to stay to in character with the insults.

Most devastating burn wins!

Modifier

This competiton gives a 1x modifier.

Competition Information
Parent Competition
[May the Fourth 2024] Week 2
Organized by
General Socorra Tenebrosa Nhar’qual Erinos, High Inquisitor "Aequitas" Anderson
Running time
2024-05-08 until 2024-05-15 (8 days)
Target Unit
Entire DJB
Competition Type
Other
Awards
First Level Crescents
Participants
40 subscribers, of which 40 have participated.
Results
Member
Proconsul Diyrian "Diy" Grivna
Textual submission

"Kamjin may be a breeze with his hands on a yoke, but he can't read his fate isn't in the stars ," ~ Diyrian

(Man's out here with no Astrogation but +4 Piloting 👌Needs a droid to coach him, laaame :P)

Placement
2nd place
Member
Battlelord Strask Rurra'bek
Textual submission

Kamjin 'Maverick' Lap'lamiz, the galaxy's self-proclaimed ace pilot, yet every time you take to the skies, it's like watching a drunken womp rat trying to navigate a starfighter. Your so-called 'skills' would make even the most novice pilot cringe in embarrassment.

Placement
3rd place
Member
Master Kamjin "Maverick" Lap'lamiz
Textual submission

Kamjin stared into the middle distance of the mirror. "You aren't really a Hutt. You've just put on some weight. They really like you and think well of you. This is just their way of showing it." A single tear rolls down his face.

Placement
4th place
Member
Envoy Zuza Lottson
Textual submission

You might be less flammable than your cards but at least they have some depth to them

Placement
5th place
Member
TuQ’uan Varick di Plagia
Textual submission

Kam is as dumb as a Hutt if he thinks we’re falling for that “youthful look” shtick. Even Palpatine looked 20 years younger when he hid his disfigured face in the shadows of his hood. You aren’t fooling anyone Kam, we can see the grey hairs sneaking as subtle as the Death Star over Alderaan.

Placement
6th place
7th place
Valhavoc
Member
Valhavoc
Textual submission

Valhavoc casually glanced over at the seemingly random person who was talking in his direction, "Sorry, but I don't even know who you are."

Placement
7th place
Member
Adept Alaris Jinn
Textual submission

"Careful, Roly-Poly, don't lose your gavel in the folds of your belly."

Placement
8th place
Member
Vynn Salm
Textual submission

"Your Mother was an Evocii"

Placement
No placement
Member
Battlelord Haro Zylrun
Textual submission

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

Placement
No placement
Member
Specialist Titius Osseus
Textual submission

After you have sought Justice, perhaps you can seek a mop for all your slime.

Placement
No placement
Member
General Ood Bnar
Textual submission

"You're so ugly, the Mother is hiding from your gaze!"

Placement
No placement
Member
Grand Master Declan Roark
Textual submission

Sarin to Kam - nice lipstick.

Placement
No placement
Member
Quaestrix Sofila "Sagitta" Douve Armis
Textual submission

"You... do realize you are not a Hutt... right?"

Placement
No placement
Member
Master Selika Roh di Plagia
Textual submission

Stop trying to make "mother" happen. It's not going to happen.

Placement
No placement
Member
Professor Sanguinius Tsucyra Entar
Textual submission

"Who?"

Placement
No placement
Member
Rear Admiral Arcia Cortel
Submission
Rear Admiral Arcia Cortel opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Nightsister Sinya Ani
Submission
Nightsister Sinya Ani opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Meleu Karthdo
Submission
Meleu Karthdo opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Adept Tahiri Thorn Morte Tarentae
Textual submission

"Where is Other Mav? What is Other Mav? Why is Other Mav?" Ro-Tahn asked confusedly.

Placement
No placement
Member
Raiheaux
Textual submission

Why you got so many lightsabers? Compensating for something?

Placement
No placement
Member
Colonel Shanree Argentin
Textual submission

Settle down off brand Mav

Placement
No placement
Member
Alaisy "Aphotis" Tir'eivra
Textual submission

"A pretty nice guy, definitely not a Hutt though."

Placement
No placement
Member
Jade Hext
Submission
Jade Hext opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Master Ruka Tenbriss Ya-ir
Textual submission

The best Kamjin could do was watch Jimkam die.

Placement
No placement
Member
Kagon Agra
Textual submission

"your mother breath was worse than the Bathar beast from Tatooine" -Kagon

Placement
No placement
Member
Dr. Bril Teg Arga
Submission
Dr. Bril Teg Arga opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Champion Rajhin Cindertail
Textual submission

You sure you don't have Hutt lineage? That armor is starting to look a little snug around the mid-section.

Placement
No placement
Member
Epis Locke Sonjie
Textual submission

I heard he thinks midichlorians are real 🙄

Placement
No placement
Member
Archian
Textual submission

Kamjin please do not laugh with mouth full of stim drinks again - you look ridiculous and spreading unwanted Hutt bacteria...

Placement
No placement
Member
Master Bentre Stahoes
Textual submission

Bentre: "Kamjin, your stench is half the reason that they say *justice is blind*."

(lousy, but I kinda like Kamjin too much to insult him even in character :P )

Placement
No placement
Member
Lord Muz Ashen Keibatsu
Submission
Lord Muz Ashen Keibatsu opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Supreme Chancellor Cassandra Oriana Taldrya
Textual submission

"He smells like Ewok...why does he smell like Ewok?" - Cassandra

Placement
No placement
Member
Nora Olen
Submission
Nora Olen opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Ghost Rulvak Qurroc
Submission
Ghost Rulvak Qurroc opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Master Aiden Lee Deshra
Textual submission

Rhylance: "Your mind is as slimy and disturbing as a Hutts underside, and as full of fat and waste as one too."

Placement
No placement
Member
Lord Idris Adenn
Textual submission

Kamjin calls himself the Duke of Juranno, but he is more like Duke of Smellslotto.

Placement
No placement
Member
Eminent Ikarri Itinen
Textual submission

You smell weird and your aspects aren't even custom

Placement
No placement
Member
Huntsmen
Textual submission

" I do not know that person but I assume with a name like that they have an intergalatic social media following..."

Placement
No placement
Member
Ghost Luka Zarkot
Textual submission

Luka: I don't know him, but he looks like the personification of a shrug.

Placement
No placement