Competition: [May The Fourth 2024] Week 3: That Deputy Called Thane...

Finished
[May The Fourth 2024] Week 3: That Deputy Called Thane...

M4

We all know about Bubba, but what about his right hand, his second-in-command, the DGM himself, Darth Renatus?

Members are tasked with creating the best IN CHARACTER insult to Deputy Grand Master Darth Renatus!

You can be as creative as you like, there is no minimum or maximum word count. However, please remember to stay to in character with the insults. :)

Most devastating burn wins!

Modifier

This competiton gives a 1x modifier.

Competition Information
Parent Competition
[May the Fourth 2024] Week 3
Organized by
Combat Master "Aequitas" Anderson, General Socorra Tenebrosa Nhar’qual Erinos
Running time
2024-05-15 until 2024-05-22 (8 days)
Target Unit
Entire DJB
Competition Type
Other
Awards
First Level Crescents
Participants
39 subscribers, of which 35 have participated.
Results
Member
TuQ’uan Varick di Plagia
Textual submission

Atra Ventus, A.K.A. Thane Skotos, A.K.A. The Dark Seraphim, A.K.A. Darth Renatus has to keep changing his name in order to convince people to like him. Since that hasn’t worked he’s been working his way up GM so he can make it a law that people have to like him.

Placement
1st place
Member
Alaisy "Aphotis" Tir'eivra
Textual submission

"You cannot insult someone who cannot feel anything."

Placement
3rd place
Member
Proconsul Diyrian "Diy" Grivna
Textual submission

"If you were anymore apathetic, I'd thought you a droid."

Placement
4th place
Member
Professor Sanguinius Tsucyra Entar
Textual submission

"Atra was a better name, but I guess vain Thane works too."

Placement
5th place
Member
Dr. Bril Teg Arga
Submission
Dr. Bril Teg Arga opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
6th place
7th place
Sage Enzo Dek
Member
Sage Enzo Dek
Textual submission

Dark haired, Caucasian Dark Jedi with Sith eyes? Which of the 20 current and past DC members are we talking about here?

Placement
7th place
Member
Ghost Luka Zarkot
Textual submission

Luka: "He's my age?! The years haven't been kind."

Placement
8th place
Member
Sofila "Sagitta" Douve Armis
Submission
Sofila "Sagitta" Douve Armis opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Epis Locke Sonjie
Textual submission

I heard he thinks womp rats are "amazing creatures"

Placement
No placement
Member
Tribune Kanal O'neill
Textual submission

Darth Renatus stinks of Sith Spawn and Rancor Poodoo

Placement
No placement
Member
Councillor Turel Sorenn
Textual submission

Oh, look at those eyes, so mysterious oooo

Placement
No placement
Member
Jade Hext
Submission
Jade Hext opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Archian
Textual submission

Hey Darth Renatus you need to stand at your head to camouflage yourself between pyramids!
Being gold it's not enough!

Placement
No placement
Member
Rear Admiral Arcia Cortel
Submission
Rear Admiral Arcia Cortel opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Supreme Chancellor Cassandra Oriana Taldrya
Textual submission

"Scar face, scar face, fa-la-la, la-la-LA!" ~ Drunken Cass

Placement
No placement
Member
Ghost Rulvak Qurroc
Submission
Ghost Rulvak Qurroc opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Valhavoc
Textual submission

You're not match for a Mandalorian!

Placement
No placement
Member
Warlord Grudac Gruud
Textual submission

There once was a man called Thane, man dude was a real pain. His eyes were all yellow, he looked like the devil, but I think he's a ripoff of Cavill.

Placement
No placement
Member
Master Ruka Tenbriss Ya-ir
Textual submission

Thane spends all the DB tax dollars on his brand contacts for his SPECIAL EYES.

Placement
No placement
Member
Lord Idris Adenn
Submission
Lord Idris Adenn opted out of publishing his submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Adept Alaris Jinn
Textual submission

Seems like they'll just make anyone DGM these days. Apparently all you have to do is be Combat Master, and then P:GM, and then Regent, and then Justicar, and then approved again for Justicar and perform at every position excellently. Loser.

Placement
No placement
Member
Envoy Zuza Lottson
Textual submission

Not even the *rats* would want to bite you

Placement
No placement
Member
Fist Uji Tameike
Textual submission

Your old name is better

Placement
No placement
Member
Master Kamjin "Maverick" Lap'lamiz
Textual submission

Kamjin exists.

Placement
No placement
Member
Colonel Shanree Argentin
Textual submission

"Your Father was a hamster, and your Mother smelled of Elderberry!"

Placement
No placement
Member
Nora Olen
Submission
Nora Olen opted out of publishing her submission.
Placement
No placement
Member
Battlelord Strask Rurra'bek
Textual submission

Renatus, you're about as useful as a moisture farmer on Hoth. Your idea of strategy is as chaotic as a Jawa flea market, and even a protocol droid has more charisma. Your attempts at manipulation are as transparent as a Rodian's poker face. Honestly, the Dark Side called—they want their reputation back after being associated with your Force Terror.

Placement
No placement
Member
Supreme Chancellor Ood Bnar
Textual submission

"He's so laid back, even the whites of his eyes have left."

Placement
No placement
Member
Hand of the Emperor Korvyn
Textual submission

"If your skin was any paler you'd be an Ale!"

Placement
No placement
Member
Dr. Rhylance
Textual submission

"Thane is nothing but a rip off artist."

"What do you mean?"

"He completely copied my mirrored black and white lightsaber concept."

"Didn't...Didn't he make those first?"

"Yeah...well...it was my idea first!"

"Hasn't he been around for much longer that you?"

"..."

"Well?"

"He's nothing but a dark brooding know it all."

"Yeah...but he's hot though!" *swoons"

Placement
No placement
Member
Grand Master Declan Roark
Textual submission

Darth Renatus. More like Darth Ren-ass-tus.

Placement
No placement
Member
Lord Muz Ashen Keibatsu
Textual submission

Darth Reborn, Wearer of Many Masks, Edgiest of EdgeLords, He Who Haunts the Wardrobe, Symmetrophobe

Placement
No placement
Member
General Kenath Zoron Ad Vizsla
Textual submission

Zoron stared at the DGM, his eyes passing slowing up and down Renatus' form. He paused momentarily at the other man's waist and let out a soft chuckle.

"Clearly the PR photos are from your 'before' era."

Placement
No placement
Member
Master Selika Roh di Plagia
Textual submission

For somebody that wants to kill the Force, he seems really bad at it.

Placement
No placement