The rain poured down in the dark alleyway that our triumphant hero was passed out in. It took a flash of lightning and a earth shaking clap of thunder to awaken the slumbering Sith.

As Kano sat up he stretched and let out a loud yawn. Raindrops softly hit the man's face as he looked up at the sky.

“What the frak am in doing in an alley?”

As Kano climbed to his feet a rat ran across the alley, splashing through a large puddle.

“To, writer dude. I asked you a question. What the hell am I doing in an alley? How did I get here? The reader will wanna know.”

[You were drunk and you passed out. Not much more to it. Now can I get back to writing this fiction?]

“Oh, yeah. Didn't mean to inconvenience you. Douchebag.”

Kano, now shooting a bird into the sky walked down the alley thinking out loud.

“How do you think out loud? Isn't that just talking?”

[Dude, stop interrupting. Let's just get this fiction going so that we can get something shiny.]

“Shiny? I'm down. Proceed mystic voice in my head.”

The Warrior turned out of the alley and onto the main street. Thoughts of riches bounced through the former Mandalorians head.

“Where can a Sith bounty hunter get come credits around here?”

At that moment, almost as if by divine planning, a piece of paper smacked into Kano’s face. He pulled the paper back and crumbled it up.

[Read the paper.]

“You can't tell me what to do!”

Kano uncrumpled the paper and read it.

“How the hell did you do that? Who trained you in Jedi mind tricks?”

[Shut up and finish reading the paper.]

Kano finished reading over the paper and was relieved to find that it was a wanted poster for a local drunk. According to the paper the man had borrowed a large sum of money from a local gangster and when he couldn't pay him back a hit was put out on him.

“What are the chances that this kinda info would be placed in a piece of paper and then just tossed out for anyone to find? It is a good thing that an idiot isn't writing my life story.”

Luckily the Warrior knew just where to find this local drunk. He turned around and went right back down the same alley he had just awoken in. He walked up to a door that looked as if someone had vomited against it and he proceeded to pound on the door as hard as he could.

After a few hard knocks the door opened and a head poked out from inside. “You again? You are banned after that crap you last night with the Rancor tooth and high explosives.”

Kano looked up away from the guy at the door.

“Are you still not going to explain the night before? That sounds fun and I really wanna know where I got a Rancor tooth in the first place.”

[No! Now pay attention.]

“You suck.”

Kano turned back towards the guy at the door to see a puzzled look on his face.

“Sorry, I was thinking out loud. I just need to know if Fez is in there, I owe him money and need to pay him back before heading to the Outer Rim.”

The Sith reached down inside himself and with a slight mental nudge from the Force the man nodded and stepped back into the building.

“Hey writer guy, I have a question.”

[What now?]

“Do I really gotta kill this guy? He just wanted to party a little. I mean wouldn't you take out a loan you couldn't pay back to tongue mop liquors off the sexiest women in this galaxy?”

[You leave my personal life out of this and stick to the story. We are almost done so you know what, just wing it.]

At that moment the door opened up and a large man came walking out. The smell of alcohol seeped out of every pour on the man's body and filled the air. The man looked Kano over for a second before opening his mouth. “Are you the chakaar that is looking for me?”

Kano leaned real close to the man and whispered to him.

“There is a voice in my head telling me to kill you but it is okay, he is a moron.”

Kano winked at the guy just before the man swung a quick right jab towards the Warriors face. The fist connected with an invisible barrier as Kano drew out his lightsaber.

The blade sprang to life with a brilliant blue glow and with a single motion Kano drove the blade upwards and through the bounty. The man was split from crotch to hair and fell into two separate parts.

“I wonder if I get paid double for that?”

[Sure, just tell the gangster that if he won't pay double you will do the same to him.]

“Really? I can do that?”

[No, the fiction is over. You probably annoyed the reader so much we won't even get a prize.]

“Ah sh…”

The End

“Lier!”

So here we are, promoted to the dizzying heights of Dark Jedi Knight, with a totally awesome Master, and looking super fly in black, and what do we get to do? We get to right royally kick butt for the Brotherhood. I know what you are thinking. How come he got to be so awesomely brilliant, whilst I’m just a dweeb with a computer writing a story that may win me fictitious awards and medals? Simple answer, because I deserve to be awesome. Not everybody can be this good looking wearing yellow and black tattoos on their melons, and carry off the horned sex god look, but I make it look easy. But enough about me...... who am I kidding, there can never be enough about me, it’s my favourite subject.

OK, so here’s the gen. My Master, Tasha’Vel Versea, who by the way is hot, is in the hospital with blood clots. I mean that’s pretty serious poodoo right there, but not surprising considering that her heart has to contend with seeing me every day. It must be a tremendous strain on her ticker there, and blood can only move so fast before it starts colliding with itself. I’m not a doctor, but I guess that’s how it all works. Anyhoo, she’s laid up in bed, and not in a good way, so I have to go visit and try and lift her spirits somehow.

So I’m walking up to the hospital, minding my own business when her husband is there. “Hey, Quo, you going up to see her?” he shouts across the pathway.

“Yeah, can’t have her wasting away up there, thinking that world has stopped turning because she’s not in control”

I knew that had done the trick, Bentre even managed a half smile “Ain’t that the truth. C’mon, let’s show willing,” turning away towards the entrance, “I’ll let you tell her though. I wonder if there’s any food up there?” He shot a glance up the glass frontage of the building.

I followed his glance.... what the?..... You know when you see something but your brain won’t register it initially, but eventually it filters through.... a bit like when you first hear you Mum and Dad going at it like a pair of rabbits.... that initial disbelief, then the realisation, then flight into action, such as hiding your head under your pillow with your walkman on full.. well that happens right now to me. There was something crawling across the glass, so high up you could hardly see it, but it was there nonetheless. It was almost indistinguishable from the background, but it was there... and that’s definitely not something that has been said about me.

“What’s that up there?” I asked.

Ben looked up towards where I was indicating “No idea, but I’m sure as hell gonna find out” Drawing his blaster he knelt, steadying his aim, taking a breath in then releasing half of it before squeezing the trigger gently. I heard the ‘Fatoom’ as the crimson bolt arrowed its way upwards towards his target, impacting the torso of the figure above. We couldn’t hear it but the window exploded into thousands of pieces, and the figure began a slow fall from the front of the building. I watched the figure twisting and turning through the air, adopting the aerodynamic properties of a breeze block, as its speed approached terminal velocity, before it smashed, like a free fall washing machine into the pavement below.

“Did the Diplomatic Corps accept your application then?” I quipped, Ben shot me a withering look. We walked over to the mass of tangled wreckage. It looked like the Gods of all Droids had been having a clear out of the workshop, and all the parts left over had been shoved overboard to land outside the hospital. Whatever type of droid it was when it was up on high it was now nothing more than used parts. Do you get scrap value on slightly used droids? I’m sure we could make a few credits from it if we could find all the parts, or we could make the worlds most difficult construction puzzle.

“Assassin droid, and looking at the head this one was relatively new. Somebody went to a lot of trouble for this, but we don’t know who the target was. Maybe we can slice into the memory and find out who it was after, and who sent it.......” Yadda, yadda, yadda.... Ben really did love the sound of his own voice, I couldn’t help it, I just zoned out. A ‘thwack’ round the head meant that Ben had finished before I could regain consciousness, oh well.

“Let’s go see Tasha’Vel, and let the investigation team try and get to the bottom of this” Stahoes turned once more towards the entrance, I guess that I should follow. I don’t like hospitals, but needs must at times, and Tasha’Vel needed saving from Ben’s recounting of the events outside. Sometimes an Apprentice’s work is never done!