Quaestor Report

2008/07/19, 10:00 PM, Quaestor - Battleteam Primus Pilus

      **One second it bright and sunny, the next rain. With just a hint MORE rain. **

</td> </tr> </table>

<font size="6">S</font>alutations Exar Kun!

Well week one is finally over, it's been a bit of a roller coaster week filled with the joy of spring and misery of winter. Take merry old England, right now we should be digging out our shorts and slapping on the sun tan cream. Even me, bulging belly 'n all am prepared to strip and get me a lobster tan. However at the moment our weather is more akin to winter with chilly breezes and rain, rain and more flipping rain! Hence my dreary Flash banner this week. Reflecting my somber mood. Still with many of us Brits fleeing the country for warmer climates and no doubt the rest of you getting a proper summer weather that just leaves me, my report to brighten the day.

This week I have ditched the music, not because you all hated it, clearly not. But you did find it distracting. Next week I'll drop a play button and you can pick and choose when you want to hear some music. Other than that you all loved the new flashy toys, which is great. Also seems my reports are being read by, well lets say external factions (hi dad!).

So, without further ado on with the report!

*New Battleteam Leader *

Cipher has been gracious enough to step up to the proverbial plate, however the Battleteam is still going to need new Flight leaders. If any of you fancy a go at it or simply want to be on the team then feel free to express an interest via email. You can reach Cipher by [Log in to view e-mail addresses].

Trainers Wanted

Mister Bloodfyre is looking for trainers for the ACC, if its something you fancy having a go at then I encourage you to get in touch with him. Here is what he had to say:

**"Plain and simple. Trainers wanted. There's a couple now (3), one on leave (Quejo). I'd rather not have 2-3 people dealing with 8 battles a piece. I'd rather have 12 people dealing with one or two a piece at a time. I don't know that I need 12 now, but I'm interested in bringing on more Trainers as soon as possible. You want to be a part of it? Send me an email. Tell me about your time in the DB, shoot me off a piece of fiction, and especially tell me about your experience in the ACC.

No time limit. I'll be accepting applications until I feel like I have enough Trainers. Help your fellow Clanmates and DB friends. If you're a talented writer, we can definitely use you. If you like to read the work of others, I want you. To those who have already expressed interest in the past few days, expect me to be getting a hold of you tonight."**

You can contact [Log in to view e-mail addresses]

*Lets go shopping! *

You'll probably have noticed a few emails from people you know in the Brotherhood enticing you with some exciting shopping opportunities. All they ask in return is for you to click on a link. Needless to say it's a cunning trap, determined to irritate. If any of you see it, resist the urge to click it. I know it's difficult, I bet when you see it your finger caresses the left mouse button. STOP! Think of the children, think of all the little people! Quite how this got into the Dark Brotherhood foodchain is a mystery to me but it seems to delete your contacts and mails itself out to everyone you know.

I would recommend deleting any such email and changing your passwords on a regular basis. For extra protection make sure you have anti virus, spyware and firewall software active and kept up to date. Also as a final note of caution be careful about any sensitive information you store on your computers.

*Koga Kage SPEAKS! *

Koga Kage, man of the midnight hour (I may be just bricking this one) has cast down his gnarled gauntlet in challange. Actually to be fair it isn't just THE CAGE (I like that nic) it's also Laigerick. Both gaming gurus who could probably whip my behind in record time want people to crush. This is what THE CAGE had to say (yeah, that nic is definitely sticking.)

"<salute> i know yall most likely know that already but im on IRC and noone is playing anything. whats wrong with that picture? a huge comp that only takes place once a week. should have a large turn out considering we`re a online "gameing" club :P so what do yall say? lets get rockin! im sitting on #outerrim and i have all the games and willing to play them. so any takers? all games consist of JO, JA, BF1, EAW,and RC i know that's not ALL of them but that seems to be the more popular. so again jump on and play me :)" </salute>

So are we going to let the upstart THE CAGE get away with this? NO! Next weekend I am going to be waiting for him with Empire at War and if I can find a copy of Jedi Outpost and Jedi Academy them too! So people, dust off your copies of...my little pony? No, that's my sisters..honest! And we shall do battle.

<font size="3">Big Al! AKA 'Alaris Jinn Keeper of Wiki Secrets' </font><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">

You know, that title would make an absolutely fabulous film, question is who would play the wise Jinn? I don't know but I am getting Woody Allen vibes here...Anyway ahem, Big Al has now become indoctrinated in the cult of Wiki, it had to happen. He has been good enough to pass on some excellent advice, worth a read if you get the time. Here's what the big man himself had to say!</font>

_**"Brothers and Sisters of Clan Plagueis,

Along with my fun and hearty AED reports and my constant reminders of the War of Ascension (COMPETE!), you all get to hear me talk about my new job. I was appointed as a Wiki Staff Member yesterday and I am officially Clan Plagueis's representative there. As such I'd like to talk to all y'all about a few things.

For those of you who are have not yet begun constructing your character Wiki article make sure that the name of your article matches your dossier name. If you have an extensive dossier name (Dacien Victae di Plagia), this is not necessarily necessary, but make sure that it at least has the basis for your name, so (Dacien Victae) will do just fine.

When you're uploading an image make sure you do two things if nothing else: 1, add the { {fairuse}} tag. This shows that the image you're using has be declared usable because of the wonderful world wide web and its ability to use anything on it fairly, hence 'fairuse'. 2, make sure you add the Image Category. For example, if the image is of your character: [Category: Images-Characters].

When editing an article and you want to see how it's progressing, use the freaking "Show Preview" button. That way, when us staffies go to the "Recent Changes" page, we don't see 8 million edits to "Yzarc Rellik Kaeth " or whatever your article happens to be.

Red links are bad. If you link something, make sure the page actually exists and make sure you spell the article correctly or put spell the URL correctly. If it still turns up red, unlink it, as it will take you a non-existent page, and that's just a pain.

There is a rule that will be uber-enforced. "If a member demonstrates the severe inability to use the Wiki correctly on at least three occasions, the member will be banned from the Wiki until they take the Wiki Basics course." We will warn the first time... and the second time... but not the third time. Third time you will get banned until we see that you have completed the Wiki Basics Course from the Shadow Academy. Get it? Got it? Good." **_

<font size="3">Join the Cult of the Teddy Bear! </font><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">

Speaking of cults, it seem there has been a growing movement amongst some of the membership. Despite my best efforts to stamp out this business it contines to thrive. I have recently confiscated numerous cargo containers bound for the Dark Tower, labelled 'wine supplies' they contain stacks and stacks of Teddys. Naturally a thorough investigation is underway. </font>

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">People, we worship all that is evil and dark how can we possibly go into battle with other Clans and even the accursed Jedi? Can you picture it? Do you for instance imagine Darth Vader putting down the rebellion clutching a lightsaber in one hand and a Teddy Bear in the other? What about the Emperor huh? Did you ever imagine Palpatine address the senate with a Teddy Bear?</font>

The headquarters for the disturbance in the force is here

<font size="3">And Finally...</font>

<font size="3">Be the Judge, Jury and Executioner, Join the Justicar! </font><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">

Yes Judge Dredd better known as Kir Katarn is looking for a new Right Hand of Justice. You too can be arresting pimps and other thugs in the bowels of Mega City 1 or the Dark Brotherhood, whichever works better for you, TODAY! Here's what Chief Judge Katarn had to say:</font>

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> _**"Since my original post has been buried, I thought I would remind everyone that I am accepting applications for the position of Right Hand of Justice through next <font color="#FF0000">Wednesday, July 23rd</font>.

See the original post here for all the important information.**_</font>"

Current Competitions

Below is a list of events which House Exar Kun can take part in. The more you enter the better, not only will your leaders be REALLY impressed but who knows? You might actually win yourself a shiny!

<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td>Title: **</td> <td>Music to the soul **</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Requested By: </td> <td>GRD Ralph vundu </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Specifics: </td> <td>Ok, everyone, this competition is all about yourself. I am challenging you all to write a poem about your character. It does not have to rhyme, it just has to to be full of imagery, and a good poem. No particular length or style. So enjoy yourselves and let your imagination wander. </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Start Date: </td> <td>7/18/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td>End Date: </td> <td>7/23/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Unit in Competition: </td> <td>House Exar Kun </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Platforms: </td> <td> </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Awards: </td> <td>4th Level Crescents to the top 3 poems. </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Comments: </td> <td>Please Submit in .doc or similar formats please. </td> </tr> </table>

<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td>Title: </td> <td>[CP] Pac-Man Munchies **</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Requested By: </td> <td>OT Yzarc Rellik Kaeth </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Specifics: </td> <td>As you may well know, your Proconsul, Yzarc, has a huge appetite. His appetite rivals that of Pac-Man. Play this (http://www.thepcmanwebsite.com/media/pacman_flash/ ) flash game. The highest three scorers will receive Crescents! Take a screenshot of your final score and send it to Braecen ([Log in to view e-mail addresses]) and Yzarc ([Log in to view e-mail addresses]). Be careful, take your screenshot as your final life ends. Do not wait, as soon as you hit the ghost, take your screenshot. </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Start Date: </td> <td>7/11/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td>End Date: </td> <td>7/25/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Unit in Competition: </td> <td>Clan Plagueis </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Platforms: </td> <td>Flash game (http://www.thepcmanwebsite.com/media/pacman_flash/ **), e-mail, screenshots </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Awards: </td> <td>Fifth Level Cescents </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Comments: </td> <td>Send your screenshots to Yzarc ([Log in to view e-mail addresses]) and Braecen ([Log in to view e-mail addresses]). </td> </tr> </table>

<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td>Title: **</td> <td>[CP] Current Events 07/08 **</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Requested By: </td> <td>OT Yzarc Rellik Kaeth </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Specifics: </td> <td>The comings and goings of Dark Jedi, especially those hailing from the seat of power on Antei, are rarely, if ever, catalogued. Yet, there are adventures and opportunities in their every day lives; be it ceremonial or exploratory.

  Write a story that involves your character and an event that either occurred (a discovery, a revelation, joining the Clan, a new Master/Apprentice pairing) or something that could feasibly happen to a Dark Jedi. Utilize your writing skills to write a fascinating tale that involves your character. If you need suggestions, please contact Consul Braecen ([BMCoffey13@aol.com](mailto:BMCoffey13@aol.com?subject=Current%20Events)) and Proconsul Yzarc ([yzarcrellik@gmail.com](mailto:yzarcrellik@gmail.com?subject=Current%20Events)) for ideas. </td>

</tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Start Date: </td> <td>7/10/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td>End Date: </td> <td>7/31/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Unit in Competition: </td> <td>Clan Plagueis </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Platforms: </td> <td>Entries must be at least two pages in length, font size 10, Arial or Times New Roman font and submitted in either .rtf, .doc or .wps; please double-space. </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Awards: </td> <td>Third Level Crescents </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Comments: </td> <td>Please submit all entries to Braecen ([Log in to view e-mail addresses]) & Yzarc ([Log in to view e-mail addresses]). </td> </tr> </table>

<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td>Title: **</td> <td>Death of a Clan **</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Requested By: </td> <td>SBL Raken </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Specifics: </td> <td>Everything ends. Nations, worlds, stars, galaxiesall will know their end in time. The cadres of dark Jedi in the Brotherhood have known existence but a few scant years. What is even their dark power compared to the inevitability of death? The universe has proven time and again that we all live at the mercy of another. Whether it is a super-power or a super nova does not matter. Nothing is forever.

  OOC: Write a story telling of the end of your clan. How does it happen? Internecine fighting? An external force? Does your clan meet its end now or in the distant future? Author your clan's demise.   

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</tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Start Date: </td> <td>7/5/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td>End Date: </td> <td>8/5/2008 </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Unit in Competition: </td> <td>Entire DJB </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Platforms: </td> <td>Word or Rich Text Format in 12pt standard font. Single-spaced. Two page minimum. </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Awards: </td> <td>2nd level Crescents for First, Second, & Third place. </td> </tr> <tr> <td>Comments: </td> <td>Email submissions to [Log in to view e-mail addresses] Please put [Fiction] in the subject line of your email. Include basic ID Line and PIN in the document file name or the submission cannot be counted. </td> </tr> </table>

<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td>Title: **</td> <td>Prophetical **</td> </tr> <tr> <td>Requested By: </td> <td>SBL Raken </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"></td> </tr> <tr> <td>Specifics: </td> <td>Power and knowledge. When combined by one steeped in the arts of the dark side of the Force anything becomes possible, even the foretelling of events yet to pass. For millennia, Jedi have heeded the words of ancient prophecies hoping at some chance to seize upon events unfolding in their time. Some prophecies have come to pass as originally scribed, some have realized themselves through sadistic twists of fate, and some have never been fulfilled at all.

  Prophecies will always be with us. With ones like ourselves able to peel back the fabric of time and glimpse the future there will always be cryptic words foretelling salvation and doom alike. If there is any profit to be had from these dark tidings we must strive to understand them.   



  OOC: Create a prophecy that could come to pass in the near future of the Brotherhood. What omens does it portend? When and where did it originate? Will it play out as described or is there some deeper meaning hidden within its lines? How will it impact the Brotherhood?   

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<font size="4" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">And finally... </font>

Welcome to the second event of the <font size="3">War of Ascension: The First Battle of Kapsina.</font>

Fiction: The Fiction section for this event is identical to the last one. Submit a fiction in .doc, .rtf, or .txt, minimum of 1 page, no maximum. Write about how your character is involved with the Battle. Are you planet-side, assassinating one of the other leaders on the surface? Perhaps you're in one of the fighters in the massive dogfight above the surface. Or maybe you're on one of the two Capital Ships. If you're character wouldn't be on Kapsina during this time, write about an NPC in one of these situations, or about your reactions to the event from wherever you may be.

Graphics: Design a logo for the Jusadih Independence Coalition.

Please submit all of your events to all of your summit leaders:

Braecen: [Log in to view e-mail addresses]

Yzarc: [Log in to view e-mail addresses]

Godo: [Log in to view e-mail addresses]

Alex: [Log in to view e-mail addresses]

Alaris: [Log in to view e-mail addresses]

End Date: <font color="#FF0000">21st July 2008</font>

<font size="6">H</font>ere are some good links for you to visit. If there's anything you'd like to see included let me know.

ICTE web site (multi player gaming better known as Iced Tea): [

http://icte.darkjedibrotherhood.com/](http://icte.darkjedibrotherhood.com/)

Dark Brotherhood - our organisation's web site

http://www.darkjedibrotherhood.com/

Clan Plagueis - our clan web site

http://plagueis.darkjedibrotherhood.com

mIRC - for all our meetings and general chit chat

http://www.mirc.com/

Dark Jedi Brotherhood Wikipedia - Super sized archive with all sorts of weird and wonderful information

http://www.darkjedibrotherhood.com/wiki/index.php?title=Main_Page

Shadow Academy - take courses and further your understanding [<font color="#cccccc">

</font>http://www.darkjedibrotherhood.com/dbjedi/shadowacademy/sa/](http://www.darkjedibrotherhood.com/dbjedi/shadowacademy/sa/)

_<font size="6">Y</font>_a know having been with my wife for the last lord knows how many years you start to develop a sixth sense, you start to pick up on things. For instance I remember owning a dog and I knew instantly that he had done something naughty by the expression on his face, that sort of down trodden expression. Alas my wife always knows when I have been up to no good. She'll go "Where's the last of the cheesecake gone?" look up and see my expression.

I of course always attempt to deny wrong doing whilst quickly brushing away the crumbs but it's a lost cause from the start. Equally I have been able to catch out my better half, on one occasion I collected her from say her parents and I know from her expression that she's snuck off with her mother and indulged in a large chocolate cake whilst me, stuck at home survive on dry crackers!

So naturally this got me wondering about all those times when women and men are amusingly different. Here a small slice of my favorite.

She says I'm fine...

As a guy, your sitting there perhaps reading a magazine, playing on Halo 3 on the Xbox 360 and you happen to glance at your significant other. She has a face like thunder. Your puzzled, so you naturally ask 'whats wrong darling?' to which she utters the immortal worse 'I'm fine'. Clearly she isn't a okay, but getting out whats wrong with her is like squeezing blood from stone. Eventually you'll beg, steal and grovel only to find out the source of disturbance is that you never noticed her new hair style!

Men, we never listen

One of my wifes chief complaints is my inability to listen, which I am of course guilty as charged. It's not deliberate I get easil distra...oww, a butterfly. Sorry what was I saying? Yes I remember one occasion especially where my wife was going into a long drawn out lecture about how I don't pay enough attention to her. Such was the epic length and detail of her speech she derserved a prestigous award! When she asked me for a responce I said "Sorry darling, what?" In my pathetic defense the laptop had thrown up an unexpected error and was milling it over in my thoughts.

*She says, how do I look in this? *

A clever and yet cunning ploy that almost every male on the face of the planet has fallen for. I once witnessed such an event with my sister and her unsuspecting man, stomping in she asked the question every man dreads!

Her: How do I look in this?

Him: Fine?

Her: Fine, is that all?

Him: Yes, looks okay.

Her: So your saying it's just fine.

Him: No, it's really good. Looks great.

Her: I look horrible don't I?

Him: No, you look really great. Fantastic. Definitely go with that.

Her: Your just saying that, I'm going to change.

Him: Oh god.

Stil confused? I know I am, depending on your gender you might want to try one of the links below.

*How to be the Perfect Girlfriend *

[http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-be-the-perfect-girlfriend](http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-be-the-perfect-girlfriend)

How to be the Perfect Boyfriend

[http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-be-the-perfect-boyfriend  ](http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-be-the-perfect-boyfriend)

_W_eek one completed as Quaestor and what a week! Let me thank everyones hard work this week and a big pat on the back for Ralphs first week as Aedile. Now taking a leaf from Jerry Springers thought for the day let me just remind the troops that this is first and foremost a club, a social one at that. We're all here because we love Star Wars and like to enjoy events and contests. Just remember that sitting on the other end of the line is a person on a computer. Not a machine. I want everyone to have fun and enjoy themselves, that's why I do this but if anyone isn't happy or feels in anyway aggrieved then I encourage you to get in touch. Can't help if I don't know, if you don't feel comfortable doing that then there's always the people above me.

I note with some glee the rapidly growing stash of medals, especially Clusters of Fire so I would love to see a bit more of that. You have LOADS of competitions going on at the moment so there's plenty to do and of course the Shadow Academy to boot. Next week I'll be rolling out my first competition so look out for that next Sunday.