Welcome to another MAA report pwnage shall ensue!
News
The Family and Clan Name Census is at an end. The results are as follows in alphabetical order:
Atema (Needs DA+ and 10 pages for Official) - 4
6463 - Tyren Atema
164 - Jades "Imperial" Atema
8396 - Xathia Atema
3944 - Robert Atema Sadow (*)
Cantor (Official) - 7
759 - Gryffon De'Urtha Cantor
7432 - Kate Cantor Flyer
83 - Keirdagh Taldrya Cantor (*)
332 - Telaris "Mav" Taldrya Cantor
111 - William Flechette Taldrya Cantor
109 - Kir Taldrya Katarn
6 - Jac Cotelin
dTana (Needs 10 pages for Official ADMINISTRATIVE PROBATION) - 10
7085 - Adien Corsair d'Tana
155 - Alex d'Tana
6402 - Debric Santhe d'Tana
8075 - Etah d'Tana
180 - Koskian 'Psyko' d'Tana
5842 - Lucius von Straumpobolopolis d'Tana
8431 - Orv Dessrx d'Tana
3612 - Phoenix d'Tana Palpatine
8154 - Rho Ozrei d'Tana
8664 - Tritus d'Tana
Dupar (Needs DA+ and 10 pages for Official) - 3
6174 Galaphile Dupar
7788 - Jaden Kyrath Dupar
5580 - Aabsdu di Plagia Dupar (*)
Erinos (Needs DA+ and 10 pages for Official) - 8
7299 - Xayun Erinos (*)
7378 - Kieran Kodiak Erinos
8571 - Juda Kodiak Erinos
7463 - Zandro Savric Erinos
6684 - Malidir Trepidus Erinos Arconae
5949 - Archean Erinos Tarentae
3206 - Welshman Corsair Erinos Tarentae
6109 - Celahir Erinos
Isradia (Needs 10 pages for Official) - 4
289 - Jonaleth Isradia (*)
4782 - Ashura Isradia
3558 - Cipher K'oranian Isradia
3463 - Ethran Isradia
Kaeth (Needs 10 pages for Official) - 7
4792 Lucien Kaeth
8743 Yzarc Rellik Kaeth
6677 Syphoc Rilkel Kaeth
4601 Dakari Kaeth
7370 Rasilvenaira Kaeth StormRaven
3704 Xan Phraz-Etar Kaeth
4520 Braecen Kaeth Kunar (*)
Keibatsu (Official) - 8
3714 - Muz Keibatsu Sadow (*)
3415 - Nekura Manji Keibatsu
160 - Shin'ichi Keibatsu Sadow
6059 - Shikyo Keibatsu
4032 - Sanjuro Keibatsu
3530 - Shimura Xhedias Keibatsu
6353 - Ashia Kagan Keibatsu
7925 - Sai Na'Ashar Keibatsu
Long (Needs 10 pages for Official) - 5
176 - Shan Long (*)
6381 - Zhang Long
756 - Gui Long
194 - Xia Long
5055 - Shuang Long
If you are listed as unofficial, you need to fulfill the requirements I have put in parenthesis next to your name before you are official. All unofficial families may not recruit any new members and will not receive any special benefits that the Herald may choose to bestow upon them. The dTana family failed to respond within the time I allowed but reported shortly thereafter. They are unofficial regardless but as a special bonus for their tardiness, I have placed them on administrative probation. Because I cannot prevent them from getting more members (they have the max), I have decided that instead I will simply make fun of them in future reports as punishment. I think this is fair in an unfair-Kaekey way
If your family is not listed above, it doesnt exist. If you previously had a family and it is not listed above, I have dissolved it because you failed to respond. Tough. Pay attention next time. Your family names have been removed. Note that if you want to reform your family, you can; but you must be in compliance with the family regulations before I will allow that.
If you share a name with someone (just two of you) and havent sent me an email informing me of this, please do so ASAP. Im looking at you, Derev.
The Clan Name Census is also complete and I will be updating the wiki with both that information and the Family Census information at some point later this week (hopefully tomorrow). I havent performed any administrative pruning of the Clan Names yet but I may if I find that some people have Clan Names who arent supposed to. Hopefully this is not the case.
Thank you to all of those that did respond even Kosk. I dont feel like I was asking very much of you and most of you were happy to comply with the rules and that makes me a happy panda. Gold star to all of you.
Policy Updates and Clarifications
Just a few minor notes here.
A few former members from the Emperors Hammer have requested their dossiers be restored since the events of last week. Just to make it clear, the established policy is that these dossiers can only be restored to the way they were on the date of the split. No EHDB ranks or medals are transferable to the DB except for those that were obtained prior to the split. This is mainly because ranks and medals conferred in the EHDB are not conferred in the same way that we confer them: they are not equivalent. If you need me to restore your dossier, just give me a copy of your dossier as it was on the day of the split (I can look in our records for you) and I am happy to restore it.
Also, Id like to remind all Clan and House leadership to email both myself and Sklib when you request things. A lot of people have only been emailing me. Usually this is sufficient: either one of us can get to things within a few hours. But sometimes Sklib might be online when Im in class or something and he can take care of something for you more quickly than I can. Please dont forget to cc him on requests sent to me. Thanks.
Projects
Updated Family Census: Complete!
Super AWOL Check: Will be done after the new CSes are implemented. They are currently in beta testing.
Das Uber Policy Revisions: Be ready for this Consuls its coming sooooon :P
Competitions
None because Im way too busy for them
Staff
Importantly, I am elevating Tarax to Arbiter Magistrate. This means that he has the access to see all the recommendations and requests in the database. He does not have any authority to process anything yet but will in the future. Sklib continues to be Sklibbish.
Other Stuff?
Chaos was appointed Taldryan Consul and thus Clan Taldryan was renamed Clan Faildryan. Terrifying. You know whats even more terrifying? Even with a Consul who fails, Taldryan will still probably win the GJW.
Closing Remarks/Rant
Alright Ive got a few things to say this time
First of all, I know some of the families Ive dissolved are going to bitch about me to Sarin and/or Muz. You know what I have to say to that? Shut it. I gave you close to 2 months to respond to me. All I asked for was a roster of your family and history if you happened to have it. That takes no more than 5 minutes to do. I realize the site was periodically down but I always extended the deadline. If you cant take responsibility for your business then I have no sympathy for you. I should make it impossible for you to get your family back. But I wont. If you really want to you can reform your family; but make sure you meet the standards.
Im really tired of family nonsense so dont push me on this stuff. Dont try to circumvent the rules because you find a loophole. Ill catch you at some point and dissolve your family with prejudice. There are no loopholes that I cant close retroactively. So dont mess.
On an unrelated topic, I dont particularly care about extra-legal Clan institutions. I simply do not recognize their authority. If your Clan has some kind of assembly/advisory body/Silly Little Conclave/group of people with family names who are inactive but think they hold power/consortium thats your business. I will always do my best not to interfere with internal Clan policies and if you want to play politics with your leaders, feel free to do so without fear of my intervention (unless you piss me off). I personally think that this sort of thing is pathetic and lame but hey run your Clan (into the ground) the way you want to. The Clan leadership (Consul and Proconsul) are the only two individuals with authority to speak on behalf of the Clan in my world. So deal with it.
On a lighter note, most all of the recommendations and requests I have been receiving lately have been very well done. Ive had to remand or deny very few of them. Thats great. Props to the entire DB for that.
Ask Kaek
I received an interesting email this week. Here it is:
_Dear Kaek,
Recently I've been seeing a lot of moronic n00bcakes using the title "Emeritus" for everything from Rollmaster of their House to Toilet Seat Warmer of their Battleteam's loo. Is there an official MAA policy on this? Can you do something about it? Its a little absurd,
Thanks,
-S.L. Oracle Emeritus, Consul Emeritus, Praetor to the KHP Emeritus, Praetor to the DGM Emeritus, Magistrate to the MAA, HM, KHP, and OHC Emeritus, Knight Commander Emeitus, Proconsul Emeritus, Quaestor Emeritus, Aedile Emeritus, Tetrarch Emeritus.
PS: Icing on the Kaek_
I felt obliged to respond just as I feel obliged to respond to every question! Here is my response:
_Dear S.L.,
Ive seen much of the same thing. Unfortunately, there is no official MAA policy on this and there probably wont be in the near future. I wish I could do something about it because I think its rather childish as well. If you do a job well, people know what positions youve held: Jac doesnt sign Grand Master Emeritus at the end of his name. I wish people would keep the resumes hidden for when they apply for something instead of prancing around as if being the Emeriti leader of their Battleteam is all-important. But unfortunately, its their right to have these sorts of things in their signatures: just as it is our right to make fun of them for it.
Hope this helps,
-Syn Kaek, Master At Arms, Master At Arms Emeritus (pre-Halc), Consul Emeritus, Proconsul Emeritus, Praetor to the Master At Arms Emeritus, Praetor to the Oracle Emeritus, Praetor to the Seneschal, Magistrate to the Master At Arms Emeritus, Magistrate to the Oracle Emeritus, Magistrate to the Sith High Warrior Emeritus, Gaming Staff Emeritus, Dark Voice Staff Emeritus, Magistrate to the Obelish High Commander Emeritus, Quaestor Emeritus, Aedile Emeritus, Rollmaster Emeritus, Sith Commander Emeritus, Sith Flight Leader Emeritus, Battleteam Leader Emeritus, Executive Director of Emperors Hammer Intelligence Emeritus, Census Director of Emperors Hammer Intelligence Emeritus, Tactics and Training Director of Emperors Hammer Intelligence Emeritus, Bureau Director Emeritus, Branch Leader Emeritus, Tie Corps Commander Emeritus, Command Attaché Emeritus, etc. Emeritus_
Until next time
Dark Side Adept Syn Kaek
Master At Arms
DA Syn Kaek (Sith)/MAA/Dark Council [ACC: JUD]
AK/GC-PoTP/SC-SoH/AC-ToSC/DC-GP/SN-BL/Cr-8A-2S-3E-4T-3Q/CF-SF/DSS-BL/SI-AuL/SoL-TC/LS-BL/S:-9M-3R-1C-2D-3Do-4Dk-1Rm-14P
{SA: MVN}
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wtf??? Tarax has access??????
BIAS!!
lol Tarax. The only thing funnier than you right now is HSK's sorry excuse for a Quaestor.
Let them eat, Kaek. They're starving.
Hah. That's funny.
Cus you're the QUA.
Hilarious.
Kaek Pwnage! Almost as awesome as Jac Pwnage , just not quite, yet! There is still time! Nice way of rubbing people's noses into the ground at overuse of "emeritus".
Nice to work with you and Sklib, cause you guys get it done fast and smooth. No complaints and naught but praise from CSP!
PS: Shouldn't you get a medal for writing a report full of absolute pwnage?
That report nearly had too much Kaeky goodness, you keep flirting with the line like that and I'll be forced to make a trip to Indiana.
Woo! Way to go Tarax on your elevation mate!
Aww, no more mandalore families? Man, I feel bad.. In fact, I feel something deep down in my chest... Oh no wait, that's just gas. =B
Yeah, I have to agree, this report was pretty ill, keep it up Kaek with all of your MAA goodness.
I like chocolate Kaek.
<3 Kaek
Wow Kaek. That made me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. Maybe that was something else... Who knows? Either way, Tally amuzes me once again.
someone wanna adopt a sexy DJK, who is very active? :P like seriously.
Love the report
Its too late tirano, I already paid for you. You're mine. All mine. Forever.
Actually, I do have "Grand Master Emeritus" in my gmail signature...
Just for the record: when the Emeritus thing started in the 90's, it was reserved for GMs. I think it was just before the split that everthing started exploding emeriti.
Buffalo Hunter Currentus
Go Jac! ;)
I do not recall who said it first... but Kaek is officially the new Goat
If I were the new Goat, everything above would have to be mostly devoid of meaningful content :P
Oh my... I think I'm in love. Must remind myself to go to the bakery tomorrow.