We had 70 entries this time, one of which was disqualified for being a blank exam—I’m fine with people skipping questions but you should have answered at least one of them.

The max score on this was 16 points and the average was a little lower relative to phase 1, with an average of 7 and median of 6. We did have four perfect scores, though, and our top 10 finishers all got at least a 14. The median time spent was about 15 minutes and we had a bunch of entries in the 2-4 minute range, so I think this was still pretty easy participation if you weren’t inclined to be a tryhard.

Anyway, onto the questions.

Answers

Question 1:

Withering under your blank stare, she explains that the device is a MACGUFFIN CRYSTAL FATHER DEADINATOR. By analyzing the unique resonances of the different parts of the Ethereal Realm (or something), you'll be able to figure out a three-part sequence. If you figure out the correct three-part sequence, you can use the DEADINATOR to broadcast it right at the Father's head and, well, deadinate him.

You are searching for three three-letter codes as you work your way through this competition. One will be hidden somewhere in the Reflection of Eos City, another will be in the Shattered Plains, and the last will be in the Corpse Fields. The three parts will form a word, for example ARB ITR ARY. When you get to the last question in this exam, enter the word (e.g. "arbitrary").

I toyed with a number of variants of this puzzle, including hiding parts of the keyword on various wiki articles, throughout SA courses, retroactively altering the official fictions, hiding stuff in site metadata, etc. etc. Ultimately, I went for something much more straightforward, which I think was probably for the best. The exam itself includes the first two parts and tells you exactly where to look for the third.

Beginning with this question, I experimented with a second-person narrative in the style of an old school text adventure or choose-your-own-adventure books. I thought it was fun, but it ended up really limiting the questions I could ask about the official fics, hence the faux breakdown midway through.

Question 2:

Your communicator beeps frantically as you cross into the Ethereal Realm, struggling to process all the status reports and pleas for help from the battle. The device mostly works in the bizarre physics of the Realm. Mostly. Rather than present you with a coherent message in plain basic, the highest priority message comes through in a bizarre sequence of blinking, colored lights.

So this is Morse code. To make things a little easier, the three words in the answer are in different colors. The answer I was looking for was “RANCOR ATE JINKAM.”

This is one of those cases where I came up with what I thought was a good idea, immediately encountered problems with it, and then kept slamming my head into it until I got something workable, wasted time be damned. There’s a million services that let you transcribe text into Morse code via sound and/or flashing lights, so this should be a really easy puzzle to make, right? Well, even knowing what it was supposed to say, I had a lot of trouble actually deciphering the audio. Also every Morse code audio system uses really annoying noises. And I didn’t like screwing people over if they didn’t anticipate needing audio for a trivia question. The lights could have offset that, but I was paranoid I’d give someone an epileptic seizure.

So I decided to represent it visually. If, like me, you’ve never had to actually use Morse code for anything, you probably don’t appreciate how long it takes to say anything. It’s 1 unit for each short/dit/dot, and 3 units for each long/dah/dash. It’s also 1 unit between each dit or dah within a given character, 3 units between each character, and 7 units between words.

If you look back up at the image, you’ll notice that I tried to add longer spaces between characters but I didn’t follow the standard. For the most part, people coped, but the middle word in particular threw a lot of people, including at least one person who I strongly suspect has professional training with Morse code.

So this is how I graded it: if you got the dit/dah sequence right, I counted it. So if you saw ate .- - . and misread it as an .- -. or p .--. I feel like that’s on me for not doing the spacing correctly. But if you came up with something else, like you added a dash or a dot in there, then it was wrong.

We had 30 people get this one, 43% of valid entries. The best wrong answer here was “We have been trying to reach you about your ship’s extended warranty” specifically because I got it multiple times, which is way funnier to me than just getting it once. As this quiz revealed, I have a shit sense of humor.

Question 3:

The other side of the portal is chaos. You elbow your way through the Brotherhood forces defending the portal and start to work your way through the spooky reflection of Eos City, trying not to think about the massive islands of stone floating listlessly above your head. Just when you think you’re alone in a quiet alleyway, you hear them:

There were two variants of this question. In one, you met a ghost matching the description of Gwendolyn “Sparks” and had to tell me she died at Arx (GJW XIV). In the other, it was Daggo Mouk, who died at Meridian Station (RoS:M). You had to get both parts for credit. 25 people got this right, making it one of the harder questions.

The other thing that changed was what the Spirit Avatars kept yelling at you: SHA for Sparks, BLA for Daggo. This was the first chunk of your codeword.

Question 4:

The spirit looks at you, its disappointment immeasurable and its day ruined. It and the chanting chorus disappear. Fake Eos City is a silly place and you want nothing more to do with it. You proceed onward into the Shattered Plains.

Uh oh! A wild Children of Mortis appears! You’re outnumbered and outgunned by an elite force.

This was another one with two variants. You met the elite shock troops of the Children’s Light or Gray faction and had to identify them. The correct answers were, respectively, the Flamesparkers or the Aegises. 26 people got it.

Question 5:

You dive into the nearest trench, desperate to get away from whoever it is you’re getting away from. You land in a mound of bloodspattered fur. By the Force—it’s Howlader! He’s been napping in this trench since the war started.

“Are you going to tell me more old man stories?” you ask, your voice quaking in fear.

“Maybe,” Howie says, scratching himself. But before he can begin, you hear blasterfire and screaming and various other sounds of battle.

“What’s going on?” Howie asks.

“I dove in here to get away from the guys from the last question,” you say, though it feels a bit silly when you phrase it like that.

“Somebody’s killing them. Stick your head up and see who it is.”

There were two variants on this one, too. You were given four potential clan militaries and had to pick the one that matched the color scheme in the question. I gave the exact names of the wiki articles I checked because they’re not the only—or necessarily even the current—articles for each clan. If you got white, black, and blue, you were looking for the Arcona Army Corps. If you got red and black, you were looking for the Warhost Army of Naga Sadow. 33 people got this one.

This question also included a picture of Howie with the second part of your codeword written in blood on his face. It was either MEL or DEL.

Question 6:

“Nevermind,” Howie says, “I remembered I don’t care.” He uses the Force to yeet you into the next region, saving me the trouble of narrating a real transition. #DCteamwork

You’re in the Corpse Fields! How delightful. Some more Brotherhood troopers jog over to you, as your Player Character privilege automatically puts you in command. “We’re from—”

“NO!” you cut them off. “I didn’t open all those Wiki tabs for the last question just so you could come out and tell me which clan you’re with. Let me look at your insignia.”

You were presented with the logo of either the Taldryan Army or the Odan-Urr United Space Command.

I picked those two because the other clan militaries that had logos included the clan’s full logo in it and that felt too easy. Nevertheless, the design and branding on these logos is really well done because 55 people got it. That makes this the actual easiest question.

Question 7:

As the de facto leader of this little group, you're the only one willing to make a decision about how to move forward. The Corpse Fields are littered with thematically appropriate creepy things. You vaguely remember a security briefing back before the war that talked about this. Basically everything here will kill you except...

Three of these hazards are documented on the wiki. The gross streams of blood are just for atmosphere, I guess. Only 27 people got this one.

Question 8:

QUESTION! My character only got one speaking line and some jerk cut her off. Who was it?

This is the part where I gave up and broke the fourth wall.

The answer is Evant back in the prologue. What a jerk. 27 people got it.

Question 9:

How many words of Mando’a are in Chapter 1?

(Or at least I hope it's Mando'a. It's not English and it's in italics.)

So there are three words in Chapter 1 that are not English and in italics: edalinare, buir, and pur'ika. Unfortunately, I underestimated our boy, Bril. Somebody pointed out that he likes to use the fanon Ul’zabrak language for flavor, which I didn't even know was a thing. So only buir is standard Mando’a. Edalinare is Ul’zabrak and pur’ika is an Ul’zabrak stem with a Mando’a diminutive suffix. I think this is really cool but it threw a wrench into this question.

So I was looking for 3, but depending on how much of a pedantic nerd you are, 1 or 2 would be more correct answers. And I will never penalize people for being pedantic nerds.

Of course, if three out of the five answers on a multiple choice question are correct, that makes it pretty easy. 59 people got it, 86% of respondents, turning it into the easiest question.

Question 10:

In chapter 2, paragraph 1, Telaris is drinking some water. Where’d he get it?

He filled it up on a sky island in chapter 1. 30 people got this one.

Question 11:

Which Council Member DOES THE CAPSLOCK THING?

That would be Rajhin, our Fist. 37 people got it.

Question 12:

So like five people proofread Chapter 1 but none of us caught that it wasn’t Chelsie Crimson that brought Rath Oligard back to life, it was Sparks. It doesn’t matter at all but I’m still annoyed at myself for missing that one. Anyway, how’s Chelsie doing?

Glimmering with energy and also dead. 34 people got this (annoying) question correct.

Question 13:

Out of the three sect leaders and Mav, who is objectively having the most fun in chapter 2? Like, literally gleeful, and living his or her best life.

Both The Seer and her rancor, J’hon, are having a blast. The Seer “cackled with glee” and the good boy likewise “chomp down on [Jinkam] with glee.” 41 people got this one.

Question 14:

Is it just me or does the Arbiter look kinda like Josh Groban? This question isn’t worth any points, I’m just curious.

This was the only question that mattered, even though it wasn’t worth any points.

Groban is currently performing as the title character in Stephen Sondheim’s Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street at Broadway’s legendary Lunt-Fontanne Theatre opposite the delightful Annaleigh Ashford. Tickets are on sale now.

Question 15:

Ignoring Evant and the Chelsie Crimson thing, which DCers actually contribute to the war effort and kill somebody in the Prologue, Chapter 1, and/or Chapter 2 fics? Pick as many as apply.

Only two: Rajhin takes down a rancor in chapter 1 and Dacien cuts a guy in half in chapter 2. Rian, Idris, and James do show up but, critically, none of them are shown killing anybody. Only 8 people got this one, making it the gotcha question and the hardest of the bunch.

Question 16:

I’m going to skip you ahead to that dramatic confrontation with the Father and whatever the hell I wrote at the top of the page. The last three letters are in the course notes for Leadership Proposals, where nobody would ever think to look.

Anyway, the Father is about to kill you so you’d better type in all nine letters now. It's three points, one point for each chunk.

If you checked Leadership Proposals, you’d pretty quickly find this section in the course notes and table of contents:

3.c - The last three letters are ESS

Yep. They're ESS. Maybe your word is beefiness. Or maybe it's fuzziness. The Scrabble UK dictionary includes jemminess, which I am very certain is not a real word even in British. Maybe after the GJW we can have a competition to define jemminess. Anyway, how was your rest week? Did you get a lot done on your event-longs? I guess that wouldn't be much of a rest.

It's kind of weird how nobody ever takes this course. I think people forget it's here. It's literally "get 5 ACs and 10 XP for a long rant you were going to email Bubba anyway." Also I am 100% going to forget I did this by October so we'll see how long it takes for somebody to submit a correction for that sweet sweet Scroll of Foundation. But don't cheat and do it before October 2 (site time), ok? You want to let the other kids have a turn.

So yeah. ESS. The other two are... somewhere. It depends on which questions the site felt like giving you. It's probably going to be a huge pain to grade now that I think of it. Oh well, too late to worry about that now. ESS. For snake.

You got 1 point for the three letters in question 3 (with the ghosts), 1 point for the three letters in question 5 (with Howie), and 1 point for looking at Leadership Proposals.

Depending on what questions the site gave you, your options were SHAMELESS, SHADELESS, BLAMELESS, and BLADELESS.

Back in question 2, we had 30 people willing to transcribe Morse code, but by the end only 20 were willing to open a new tab and look at Leadership Proposals for a point. However, the war has been over less than a week and TuQ has already passed Leadership Proposals, so my effort to draw attention to the course seems to have worked. I removed this from the course notes so nobody got an SoF for reporting it, though ironically TuQ did get one for an unrelated error.

16 people, or 23%, got all three chunks of their codeword, making this the second-hardest question. A few people left me really nice messages instead. My sincere thanks to everyone who took the time and energy to participate in my comps and Great Jedi War XVI: Transcendence in general—there’s a lot of other ways you can choose to spend your time, and I appreciate that you’re spending it engaging with our club. I hope you enjoyed the trivia and I’ll leave you all with the best wrong answer for this question:

THE GAME HA