Fiction

Blind Leading The Blind

“Ok, so which of you old people is going to go through these reports with me?”

“Can’t,” the first Arconae replied quickly.

“Can’t, or won’t?”

“Either,” Strategos answered as he swirled the contents of his drinking glass.

“Well, you can’t just expect me to do all of this by myself!” K’tana nearly shrieked in frustration. The little creature sitting upon her shoulder jibbered angrily towards the dark-haired Entar, her tail swishing back and forth over the Twi’lek’s shoulder.

Timeros and Strategos exchanged a look. Wordlessly agreeing on their collective answer, the Entars gave nonchalant shrugs that would make a cat envious.

K’tana opened her mouth to push her point, but closed it when she saw the look of finality in her Master’s visage. In this case, no really meant no. She stared at him a moment longer, giving a brief smirk before turning her back to him. The Kowakian Monkey-Lizard snapped her beak and leapt from the Priestess, lunging at Timeros.

Mid-jump, the blond Entar side-stepped the little beast and locked his icy gaze on the Twi’lek’s pet. As Liera hit the ground she skittered towards the wall and immediately sunk down to shiver in the corner.

K’tana gave Timeros a dark scowl before turning her sharp green eyes to the next person in the room. He stood like some pretty, mute statue who was paying attention to everything in the room but her.

“Oh, Former Billowy Cloak Lord, you should do somethin’ helpful for your new Gatewarden--”

“Nope,” Marick said flatly as he pulled out his datapad and started to tap through a series of menus. K’tana pressed her palms to her temples before lifting her lekku and throwing them over her shoulders with a wail of exasperation.

“Fine then! I will get one of the other minions to do the paperwork.” The Twi’lek fished around the mess of a desk for her communicator. She shoved random papers off the surface, unfazed by them fluttering to the ground, and finally found the comm. Moving the device to her lips, she thumbed the button that had been painted bright purple for her so that she always knew which one to press. She paused as she thought of who to call.

Skar was a warrior and would probably balk at being asked to handle any type of administrative duties . He might end up eating the paperwork instead. Or tearing it to pieces in some kind of frustrated pique. The Obelisk, Mirus, had just left Shadow Gate (to follow his wife as she went to fulfill her own ends) and was probably too busy slamming a metal hammer against other shiny metal.

Oh...shiny...I love shiny!

Refocusing, K’tana pinched the bridge of her nose, hoping to dull down the pain in her skull and considered her other members. Yuh’orah, her Apprentice, was not ready to undertake the strain of dealing with the Arconae (let alone the Entar-jerks) and that left…

“Ugh. Kark me.”

The only options left were the two Miraluka. Revs had been Gate Steward before her and, from what she had been told, Mks Ehn had been a Battleteam Leader in his old life. Surely they would be perfect to dump the task off to.

“Revs, Mks, office, stat!” she giggled softly to herself and looked back around the room, her eyes settling on Strategos.

“Oi! Stratty, can you magic up another one of those?” her head inclined to the Entar standing next to her desk, his drink swirling around his glass.

“Do you even know what I’m drinking?” When she giggled and shook her head he muttered, “You philistine.”

K’tana’s eyes shot to Timeros, with a pout on her lips she walked up behind him and tugged on his sleeve.

“Mastimeros, what’sa phill-stine?”

A sudden cold energy wrapped around the Twi’lek and chilled her blood. Her grin grew wide and she opened her mouth to taunt her Master just as the door opened and two men walked in.

“What can we do to help, K’tana?”

“I need’ya to read over this chud, and give me a breakdown of each. We will use the information to figure out our next steps in doing sneaky stuff on Port--”

She trailed off as both Miraluka studied the papers they had been handed. Mks was holding his upside down, tilting his head to one side like a curious Cythraul pup. Revs simply poked at his screen and offered a tight grin.

“Oh, karking chud. Neither of you can read.”

Strategos broke out into a laugh. Marick and Timeros kept their visages stoic, but she could sense their shared smugness through the Force. She raised an eyebrow before slapping her palm against her face and sliding it down her cheek.

“Frangbiting-frazlat-kark. You karking people are useless! This...THIS is why I play with gangs instead of...whatever’ya all are. Kika-lekki guide me,” she muttered under her breath as she started to read the first report, swallowing bile and boredom with every word.

“You eswo frazlat firith. Get the kark out of my office before I skin ya and feed your chunks to May’riia.”

Introduction

Gatekeepers! Your majestic Gatewarden has some crazy exciting news for you as part of her- very first- mid-month report! I’m gonna stop talking in third person now because it’s weirding me out. (ONWARD!) ((#TheseAreAsides))

I want to start off by giving a big “THANK YOU” to Rhianne for being an awesome, level headed BTL. So, Shadowy Badasses of SG...Go show some love and tell her thank you. Also, a personal thank you from me for putting up with my crazy and showing me how to do this properly and professionally. Your patience was greatly appreciated. “So long and thanks for all the fish.”

Secondly! THIS!

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Thank you to Mr. Advisor, Marick Arconae (Wallaby) for co-writing this with me!

WHICH LEADS TO MY POINT!!! CHILDREN OF SHADOW GATE! THIS NEXT SECTION IS SUPER IMPORTANT!!! (I totally pay attention to important repor--oo shiny. Er, I mean...Do as I say, not as I do.)((I actually have always paid attention to my Battleteam reports. As a regular member, I’ve always felt that Battleteam reports apply to me more than anything above that.))

Shadow Gate News

Beloved Battleteam, Your Gate Warden-ess has decided to be a Lone-icorn for the time being. I need to make sure I know all the ropes of running a Battleteam if I want to pass my knowledge to someone else. It would be unfair of me to drag a Sergeant along with me as I work towards learning all the ropes. Once I’m in a position of comfort and confidence, I will be picking one of my lovely Gate Keepers who I believe will be the most beneficial to the team. Thank you Revs and Skar for your applications. You will be the first I contact when I am ready to make my choice.

Second!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHH!!!! GUYS! THE RO IS (ALMOST) UP!!! GET YOUR DEEP COVER ALIAS AND LETS PUT THE BADASS TEAM IN BATTLETEAM! I’m not even joking. I want YOU all to show why Shadow Gate is one of the COOLEST concepts for a team. Seriously! What is cooler than being Archer with Force Powers?! (Nothing. Not a gorram thing.)

Roster Changes:

We are saying a sad goodbye to Rhianne and Mirus. Have fun with all your gfx-y goodness guys! <3

AND HELLO TO YUH’ORAH! Everyone, please welcome our lovely Zeltron Lady to the group! Let’s show her why we’re awesome and full of Tigericorn Blood and Epicness!

Katicorn’s Korner

Okay, so since I have yet to get a BTS and I’m putting out this report mid-month (ish),I’m going to take this as my time to be level with everyone over something. I have two conflicting parties of opinion. Party one does not think I take this seriously. Party two doesn’t like it when I get all political with them. So, here’s the thing. I cannot and WILL NOT try to please everyone. I can be totally hyper and ridiculous while going into BTL mode and getting chud done. I, in fact, can even adult and do it well. (I don’t like doing it, but I can. And I have. And I will continue to do so...even if I don’t tell you about it ;p)

Those who disagree, I will prove you wrong. Because I am a Unicorn. Full of magic and spite. To those who know I can...I know you secretly worry, but I will not let you down. (Because, duh, Katicorn)

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Upcoming Projects/Things to Do

As, I’m sure, you all know Shadow Gate, House Qel-Droma and Arcona are revamping, fleshing out and creating wiki things...And I’m helping! :D I will be drafting you all soon once a my evil plans and their blueprints are perfected. (MUAHAHAHAHHHAHAA)

Wiki Updating

There will be something about this in the next report. I’m plotting something you wonderful creatures will love!

Competitions

I seriously cannot hype the RO enough! I will chase all who don’t post, at least once, with a serrated metal spatula...For I’ll write you into a horror story. By that I mean I will write a story about your character and totally write them wrong! (Best threat evar. I know <3 )

Awards

Stickers! ALL THE TWO - THREE WEEKS OF STICKERS!!! GO ADMIRE THEM!

Marick Arconae

• Crescent with Sapphire Star
• 2 Clusters of Ice
• Crescent with Amethyst Star

K’tana

• 9 Clusters of Ice
• 2 Crescents with Emerald Star
• Crescent with Amethyst Star
• Crescent with Sapphire Star

Strategos Thanatos Entar Arconae

• Crescent with Quartz Star
• Crescent with Topaz Star
• Made it to another year with his liver, mostly, intact. (I’m only assuming this)

Timeros Casus Entar Arconae

This guy gets the patience award for putting up with my crap. It’s imaginary, but I’ll draw him a banana sticker, or something.

Rrogon Skar

• Got a Lady-Friend. I think that’s all I need to say about that!
• (Go earn her stickers!)

Kanis Da’uul

• We are going to get you moving again!

Mks Ehn (Watch out! We gotta badass o’re here!)

• Crescent with Emerald Star
• 20 Clusters of Earth

I will be covering the full month of stickers/medals in the end of the month report. I will have the most active member written into a fiction (type of their choosing) that will be going in the above Fiction slot of that report. (Yes, before you ask, it will be rated PG :P )

Congrats to all of you!

The Things That Give Shiny Stickers!!!

Shadow Gate Battleteam/House Qel-Droma/Arcona Competitions

(Tigercorn Blood and whatnot)

• The Caped Crusader- Fiction
• Sentence Run-On III- Other
• DJB Roadhouse- Fiction
• Arconan Gaming Dominance- Multiplayer Gaming
• Tales of the Table- Fiction

Don’t forget to check out our Consul’s takeover of the Sentence Run-On III

Brotherhood Wide Competitions

(Things for the whole group!)

• All the Rage-Other
• Mobile Gaming- Cytus- Single-Player-Gaming
• Road to Damascus- Fiction
• A Tourist’s Guide to the Galaxy- Fiction
• ComPUnction for Puns- Other
• A PUN Little Fiction Competition-Fiction .

Don’t forget to check out the rest of the competitions in the link below.

• Competitions

And read news! (If you haven’t looked at the HRLD report and checked out Abbey’s new custom robes, you are seriously missing out!)

In Closing

So, I think that's about all I need to talk about. Tl; dr- Read the report <3 xoxox Arcona Invicta!